DR. WALLACE: My dad has a good job and he hardly ever misses a day at work. However, my mom and I are aware that he is an alcoholic. We are worried that all he does is work his 40 hours per week, sleep about 56 hours a week, and then drinks all the rest of the time. He starts drinking as soon as he finishes his dinner, and it's usually the real alcoholic beverages, not just beer. When he is home on the weekends, he eats, drinks, and watches TV.

He admits that he is addicted to alcohol, but he won't stop drinking because he says he enjoys it and doesn't want to stop. My mom and I are very frustrated and hate to see him waste his life on alcohol. Besides, he is also wasting our lives because we have very little interaction with him because he is always drinking.

We have tried to get him to limit his drinking, but it hasn't done any good. We are lucky that his drinking hasn't been a financial problem for our family. Any help or encouragement you can give us will be greatly appreciated. — Nameless, Del Rio, Tex.

NAMELESS: It's extremely difficult to control the amount of alcohol an alcoholic consumes, and home treatments such as scolding, threatening, preaching, or nagging simply are a waste of time.

Rarely will an alcoholic stop drinking on his own. First, the alcoholic must want to stop drinking and then seek help from an outside source. Alcoholics Anonymous is a good place for him to start. You should get in contact with Alateen, which is for teens who have an alcoholic parent. Look up the address of your nearest chapter in the white pages of the telephone book. Alateen is a good organization that will provide useful information on how to cope with dad's drinking problem.

It appears that, presently, your father thinks more about alcohol than he does about his family. Make sure he reads your e-mail and my response - when he is sober. It just might cause him to see the damage he is doing to his family as well as to himself.

CRYING IS PART OF THE HEALING PROCESS

DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend and I just broke up and I've really got the blues. Jason and I dated for over a year, but we both felt it was time to move on. Still, I feel miserable and do a lot of crying. How long will this depressed feeling hang around? What can I do to speed up the healing process? Normally, I'm a very happy young woman. — Sad, Big Spring, Tex.

SAD: Crying is part of the healing process, but you should also get on with the rest of your life. Now would be a great time to enrich yourself by taking on a brand new activity, such as working out, joining an interesting club, or starting a hobby. New activities will help you forget your ex-boyfriend. They will boost your spirits and allow you to make new friends.

Despite the hurt, breakups are usually for the best. It's normal to feel sad when ending a relationship. But you have learned a great deal from this experience, and you will know much more when you begin your next relationship, which almost certainly will be better.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.