DR. WALLACE: What is the definition of self-esteem? My counselor told me that I need to improve my self-esteem, but I'm not sure I know what it is. She didn't say what it is or how I can improve it, and I'm too embarrassed to ask her. Can you help? — Nameless, Denver, Colo.

NAMELESS: The National Association of Social Workers defines it as how you feel about yourself. People with good self-esteem possess self-confidence and self-worth, and believe that they can reach their goals. Those who have low self-esteem usually tend to view themselves poorly and feel that others view them the same way. They also tend to put themselves down often. They may feel or even say aloud, "I'm stupid" or "Everyone hates me."

Make an appointment with your counselor and get her opinion on what you can do to improve your self-esteem. It can be done in a short period of time if you dedicate yourself to improving your self-image.

DRUG ABUSE IS A WORLD PROBLEM

DR. WALLACE: My friend's father just returned from a two-week business trip to Amsterdam. He said the Holland countryside was beautiful and the people friendly, but he was shocked at the number of young people doing drugs out in the open on Dam Square in the heart of the city. He even learned that the government supplies free needles for drug users who shoot up. I thought our drug problem was bad, but it must be a lot worse in other countries. — Jacob, Lake Charles, La.

JACOB: The drug epidemic has penetrated every country on earth and will probably get worse before it gets better. Unfortunately, it has hit the United States with its greatest force. According to the National Council on Alcoholism, youth in the United States have the highest rate of illicit drug use of any industrialized nation. It's a sad, sad fact!

THIS GUY HAS ASKED ME OUT

DR. WALLACE: I'm infatuated by an absolutely great guy and the infatuation grows day by day. My problem is that one of my girlfriends also has feelings for him. This guy and I have been chatting regularly at school and it's obvious that he is interested in me. I asked him if he had any romantic feelings for my girlfriend and he said no, but that he considered her to be a good friend.

This guy has asked me out and I'm going to go out with him, but this might put a crimp in the friendship I have with this good friend. What should I say to her? I must tell her that he asked me out and that I'm going to go out with him. I don't want her to find out after the date. — Worried, Columbus, Ohio

WORRIED: Talk to your friend face-to-face and tell her that you are excited that this boy has asked you out. Tell her that you have decided to go out with him. Also say that after the date you'll let her know how the date went and if you plan to see him again. Finish by telling her that you wanted to share the news with her because you knew she would be happy for you.

Only time will tell how she reacts, but at least she knows that you were honest with her.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Charles Henry