DR. WALLACE: My family decided a few years ago to put away some extra cash in a small lockbox we have hidden in a very safe spot in our home. (No, I'm not going to say where, even though my letter will be anonymous!)

The idea for this money is that it's supposed to be there for emergencies. The last time I looked there was over $500 in the box!

Last week, I had a situation that I considered to be an emergency. I needed about $150 of the money, so I asked my parents if I could have it from our emergency fund, and they said no! They said the money was only for "true emergencies" and that my particular situation does not fit their definition of a true emergency.

I didn't know when we set this up that I would need to write a book report on why I need to tap a few bucks out of our "family kitty."

In my world, the reason I need the money is an emergency. I did contribute some money to this fund, but I will admit that I put in under $100. How can I convince my parents that I should get access to this emergency money? — Locked out of the Box, via email

LOCKED OUT OF THE BOX: Since I don't know the specifics of your request nor the original terms your parents laid out when this fund was created, I can't give you a firm answer either way. But often in life, it's worth suggesting a compromise.

You could suggest that you access half the money you need from this fund and do extra work around your home or yard to earn the rest. Alternatively, you could ask your parents for a short-term loan outside of the money in the lockbox, a personal loan you'd repay as quickly as possible. If you follow my first suggestion and the request is granted, you should also go on record saying that you'll replace the money soon. Then follow up and do this without fail. It's important to the whole family that this fund stays intact and liquid to help with any big challenge that may arise.

SPLIT THE COSTS

DR. WALLACE: During the pandemic, I let my brother borrow my car so he could go to and from work, since he is one of the lucky few who has had a job during a large part of our national shutdown. He works in an essential industry that has remained open throughout these trying times.

Well, my brother said he would pay me $10 every time he drives my car round-trip, and he promised to replace the gas. This worked out fine until he got a flat tire, and now he wants me to pay for it! The tire still has plenty of tread; he simply drove over a large nail that created a big-enough leak that couldn't be plugged.

I feel that since the flat occurred when he was using the car, he should be responsible for the repair costs. Who do you think should pay? — Automobile Owner, via email

AUTOMOBILE OWNER: I think it's fair to split the cost of the tire repair. On the one hand, it is indeed your car, and you are responsible for regular maintenance, which, theoretically, is what his $10 payments are for. But this situation does not involve regular maintenance, like an oil change.

On the other hand, the flat occurred while he was driving, but it was not caused by old tread that finally wore through due to long-term usage. Had that been the case, I'd say he would have a point under the umbrella of maintenance. But this was an unusual occurrence that does not easily fit into either of your areas of responsibilities.

If your brother had bumped into a cement pole at a gas station, causing fender damage, that would be all his responsibility to repair.

So, since he drove in good faith — safely and with no driving error — and since you are the owner of the vehicle, who must keep it maintained, I see this as an equal split between the two of you.

If he does not agree, he'll have to find an alternative mode of transportation.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: kschneider2991 at Pixabay