DR. WALLACE: Last month I went to a friend's party celebrating her 17th birthday. I don't drink alcohol, but at the insistence of another friend, I had a mixed alcoholic drink. It was my first taste of booze. Unfortunately, I had two more mixed drinks and got tipsy.
I was still tipsy when I got home and that caused my parents to go "ballistic." I got the lecture of my life and was placed on a three-month restriction. That meant that I could not leave our house unless I was with a parent. The only exception was to attend school.
I'm off restriction now. I apologized for my miserable behavior and solemnly promise that I wouldn't touch alcohol again until I'm 21 — if even then. I am now 18.
My concern is that almost every day now, my parents, (one, or both) tell me how disappointed they are with me because I came home "drunk as a skunk." I'm tired of hearing about being "an alcoholic." I used to love and respect my mom and dad very much, but lately I don't care to be around them and my love for them has turned to disgust.
I've never been in trouble at school or with the law. I get excellent grades and I've earned a partial scholarship at the university I will be attending in September.
Before my "drunken stupor" I was concerned about leaving home. Now I'm thrilled to be getting out of my house soon.
Dr. Wallace, I am not a criminal. I'm just a teen that made a mistake. I've apologized and served my punishment. Isn't it possible my parents are overreacting and it's time for them to show love and forgiveness for their daughter before they lose her forever? My parents are ardent readers of your column. — Nameless, via email
NAMELESS: Let's hope that mom and dad are reading this comment. I can understand that they were disappointed with your experiment with alcohol, but an apology, a punishment and a promise to never let it happen again should renew the trust that parents have in their children.
Consuming alcohol to the point you become tipsy is a serious breach in trust, but you are human and humans are prone to making poor judgments sometimes.
Your parents, I believe, are making a mistake by constantly reminding you of your error. It's time for them to forgive and forget and return to being proud, loving, compassionate parents now - before it's too late.
YOU COULD WORRY ABOUT A MORE SERIOUS PROBLEM
DR. WALLACE: I'm a 16-year-old girl who had a perfect complexion until three months ago when a slight bit of acne appeared. This also occurred after my boyfriend and I started a sexual relationship. Up until then I was a virgin.
A friend of mine said that sexual conduct caused the blemishes. If I stop having sex, will my complexion clear up? If that is true, I'll stop having sex until I get married. — Nameless, St. Louis, Mo.
NAMELESS: According to southern California dermatologist, Dr. Jeffrey Lauber, "There is no evidence that sexual activity has any role in causing acne. Sexual activity, or the lack of sexual activity, will not influence an acne condition."
Visit a dermatologist and your complexion will improve.
Also, stop the sexual activity. If you don't, you could have a lot more to worry about than a few facial flaws.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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