DR. WALLACE: I just want you to know how much I appreciate your column. About three years ago, I wrote to you to find a pen pal and you sent me the name of someone to write to.
I'm 19 years old now and my life has been very trying for me. If I didn't have my pen pal, I'm sure I would have given up my place in this world a long time ago. I had nothing else to live for except his positive reassuring letters.
Right now I am starting to feel better about myself. I know I've got a long way to go, but now I realize that I'm headed in the right direction. All I can say is thank you! — Madison, Portland, Maine.
MADISON: I'll return the compliment! Your letter lets me know I'm doing something right. When I left high school administration to write this column full-time, my main concern was that I wouldn't be in touch with teens personally any more. It didn't take me long to realize that the column was a way of reaching millions of teens over the years.
All the best to you, and I hope you and your pen pal enjoy a lifetime of wonderful correspondence.
SHE EATS LIKE A BIRD
DR. WALLACE: My brother is 19 and he just got married. His new wife is also 19, and I think she has an eating disorder. She is 5'6" tall and weighs less than 100 pounds. She also eats like a bird. My brother thinks she is just thin and doesn't have a problem, but I think she's anorexic, and this worries me.
Can you tell me how to know if a person is anorexic? I need to know the signs of anorexia so I can share them with my brother. — Alisha, Reno, Nev.
ALISHA: Your fears may not be unfounded. Anorexia nervosa occurs predominantly in teenage girls (90 percent), but it also occurs in males. A person should see a doctor for possible anorexia if the following signs are prevalent:
1. Intense fear of becoming obese that does not diminish as weight is lost.
2. Disturbance of body image — claims to be overweight even when emaciated.
3. Weight loss of at least 25 percent of original body weight.
4. Refusal to maintain body weight over a normal weight for age and height.
5. No known physical illness that would account for the weight loss.
6. Eats like a bird.
IT MIGHT BE BEST TO BREAK UP NOW
DR. WALLACE: Zack and I have been dating for almost a year. I recently met a guy at a party for my cousin in a nearby town and he really turned me on. He asked if I was seeing anyone and I lied and said I wasn't. I went out with him four times, but then I stopped seeing him. Zack didn't know about all this, but I decided to tell him about it in case he would find out. He was upset, but he forgave me and we continued to date.
To my surprise, Zack told me last weekend that he had been taking out another girl for the past month, but that he likes me better and the cheating score is now tied. I'm totally confused now, and don't know it we should try to work out our problem and stay together, or if it would be better to go our separate ways. What do you think? — Nameless, DeKalb, Ill.
NAMELESS: It appears to me that you are both still in the game-playing stage and it might be best to break up now, rather than wait for further betrayals.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
Photo credit: Travis Wise
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