DR. WALLACE: My mother likes to pour a glass of red wine for my dad and any other adult guest who joins us for dinner at our house. This only happens when someone joins us. On all of the regular nights when just our family eats dinner, my parents never drink wine or any alcohol at all, for that matter.

Last week, our aunt, my mother's oldest sister, joined us for dinner. My mom poured three glasses of red wine to go with the dinner, one for my father, my aunt and herself. My aunt took one sip of the wine and then looked at my mother and said, "This is not French wine, is it?" My mom explained it was a red wine from someplace called the Napa Valley in California.

My aunt then gave her the wine glass back and said she was not going to drink it, because it was not French wine! Why is French wine so great, and why do some people refuse to drink any wine that's not from France? — I Didn't Understand This, via email

I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THIS: Some people feel that wind from France is superior to wine from other countries, including the United States. However, many other people disagree. At the end of the day, preference in wines is subjective. Every individual may have a different opinion, just the way some people like certain movies, and other people don't.

This will not be the last time you will see this particular phenomenon in your lifetime. There's definitely a slice of the population that enjoys French wines, French food and culture, including what they consider to be a gourmet dish of escargot. (Escargot is cooked snails in a savory sauce!)

My take on this situation is, "To each their own." Meaning, different people will like different things!" However, I'll conclude by saying that your aunt's refusal to even drink a glass of red wine from California seemed to be a bit overbearing, especially given that it was offered to her by her sister along with a home-cooked meal.

HIS SHOCKING PROPOSAL INCLUDED A KICKER

DR. WALLACE: I'm 19 and my boyfriend from the past seven months is 22. He totally stunned me a few days ago by asking me to marry him. I was so shocked at first that I didn't really know what to say, but he kept prodding me so I literally told him my answer was a "tentative yes." I told him at that moment that I absolutely loved him and cared for him, so it wasn't about him, it was about me at my age deciding about my future.

After the euphoria of the moment subsided and a few days passed, I brought up to him the subject of my wanting to attend college in the fall. He didn't like that idea at all, as he felt it might be possible for us to start a family somewhere within the four or five years it would take me to attend college. He recommended that I start a home-based business instead! I told him I didn't have any specific ideas about that, but he told me that if I did the research and studied it like I would a college course, I'll figure something good out to do.

Now I'm in what I perceived to be a difficult position. On the one hand, he is expecting me to follow through and start making wedding plans with him, but on the other hand, I don't feel comfortable with him telling me that he doesn't want me to attend college. What do you think about the situation I'm in? — His Proposal Completely Surprised me, via email

HIS PROPOSAL COMPLETELY SURPRISED ME: I think that the fact you answered with what you called a "tentative yes" was an early indicator that you absolutely needed time to think things over. Having your fiance attempt to control you before you've even walked down the aisle together doesn't sound like a harmonious start to me.

His role should be to support you, respect you and want the two of you to pursue your own individual goals within the context of a life together. It appears to me that he's pushing the issue of calling the shots as to what you will do and how you will spend your time.

At the tender age of 19, you have a lot of life in front of you, so my advice would be not to rush into anything, especially a potential marriage that is going to crimp one of your personal goals, namely, achieving a college education. I feel your next decision should be deciding whether you want to back off from getting married right away, but continuing this relationship for a while longer to see where it goes, or moving on entirely. Making that decision should be a prerequisite to even considering marriage at this point in your life.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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