DR. WALLACE: I'm 18 and a first-year student at the University of Minnesota. The fellow I'm dating is a senior at the U of M. We have been seeing each other since school started last September. This guy is super, and I love him very much. He is a perfect guy for me. He also feels that I am the perfect gal for him. Both of us are pre-med students. We both plan to enter into the medical profession. We both feel we are a perfect match!
I feel that we know each other well enough to start a sexual relationship. My guy doesn't like that idea because he thinks that a sexual relationship damages an excellent, developing relationship more than it helps it. I disagree. We are both intelligent adults who know the precautions of safe sex. Both of us have been involved in sexual activity while in former relationships.
I've been reading your column for quite some time and know that you will take my boyfriend's side rather than mine. But maybe you have changed your mind because you are a little older, and with age, you are a little smarter. — Anonymous, Minneapolis
ANONYMOUS: I still believe that a sexual relationship be'TWEEN unwed young couples drives a higher percentage of breakups as compared to couples who are not sexually active. Your guy seems very logical with his longer-term thinking about your relationship. Remember, if the two of you do get married someday, you will have a lifetime to enjoy the intimacies of marriage. Meanwhile, keep reading this column; I appreciate it. And in a few more years, I plan to be a little smarter — just as you say!
GIVE A PET A LOVING HOME
DR. WALLACE: I wrote to you recently and was thrilled that you took the time to answer me. I was the one who was having problems learning biology. I followed your instructions and had an after-school meeting with my counselor, my mother and the teacher. I'm happy to tell you that I wound up with a B for the semester.
My father gave me $25 as a reward for bringing up my grade from a D, so I'd like to donate the money to your favorite charity in your honor. If you don't agree, I'll buy $25 worth of chocolate and eat it all! — Thankful, via email
THANKFUL: You've made me an offer I can't refuse. Please donate the money to a local animal shelter in Brownsville, Texas. Animal shelters go above and beyond the call of duty to help homeless pets, and they do everything possible to see that these animals find homes where they will be wanted and loved.
Also, if you don't have a pet, take a tour of the shelter and consider giving one a happy, loving home!
WHAT CRIME DID HE COMMIT?
DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and going with a guy who's18. We are very close and care for each other very much.
The problem is that his dad is in prison, and I haven't yet shared this with my mother. Do you think I should tell my mother? I know if she would find out she would be mad that I didn't tell her and might make me break up with him.
My boyfriend believes in the proverb, "Let sleeping dogs lie." What should I do? — Unsure, Atlanta
UNSURE: It's better that your mother hears it from you rather than from someone else. Find out why this man is behind bars before you tell her; when you tell her, she will surely ask. Also, be prepared to explain why you trust your boyfriend and how he differs from his father in terms of judgment and actions. Also, if your boyfriend's mother is a nice person and a good role model, be sure to include her in your conversation with your own mother.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected] To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.