Ellen came from a blue-collar family. Her father worked in construction and her mother was a beautician. Her two brothers were both electricians. She always assumed she was a blue-collar kind of girl who needed a blue-collar kind of guy.

Blue-collar men were "honest, loyal, hardworking guys with family values." After college, she spent a few years dating cops, firefighters and delivery men. She dated very few white-collar guys and found them "arrogant, self-absorbed workaholics who only cared about money and material possessions."

But she wasn't getting along that well with her blue-collar guys either. "They weren't always so honest, tried and true. They pretended to be in a serious relationship with me by calling everyday and seeing me every weekend. But their great schedules, pagers and cell phones allowed them plenty of time to see others, too."

Case in point: blue-collar Rich. Ellen wasn't sure if she could trust him when fate hit her over the head and told her in neon letters that she couldn't. It happened one day when she was waiting out a rain storm in a coffee shop. She struck up a conversation with a young woman. Ellen mentioned she was dating Rich, and, sure enough, the woman knew him. In fact, she was dating him, too. He had told her about Ellen and said that Ellen knew he was dating others.

"When she realized I did not, she told me everything. I was shocked and happy to get the kick in the pants I needed to move on."

Ellen decided to try speed dating. She met a lot of men that night, but there was one man she noticed who noticed her that she didn't get to officially meet. Time ran out, but he made a point of coming over and introducing himself.

"We had a short chat before another woman who had overheard his white collar profession ran over to introduce herself. I figured she needed him or his profession more than I did, so I just wrote his name down on my list, waved goodbye and left. He did the same. A few days later, Brian asked me out. I was busy that weekend, so we made a date for the following Saturday night."

Two days before their date, Brian called and said he needed to cancel. He said when Ellen couldn't go out last week, he asked out another woman he'd met at speed dating and they were going on a second date. He said, "I don't date more than one person at a time."

Ellen was blown away. She wished him luck and thought, "Wow, how refreshing to find there are nice, honest guys out there." A few days later Brian asked her out.

"Brian showed me that it's not the collar; it's the man. As we dated, I found out that he's not only successful, but he knows how to balance work and relationships. He has all the traits I thought only blue-collar men had.

"I'm thankful that Brian broke our first date three years ago so that someone as misguided as me was able to recognize the wonderful man who's been my husband for two years."

Have you ever been taken by a con man or con woman? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to [email protected]. And check out my new website askcheryl.net.