Dear Cheryl: My husband and I have been married for over 20 years and go to the same internist. Every month or so, he tells me when he's running out of his blood pressure pills, and I call our doctor. (He doesn't like to make phone calls.) The doctor puts together samples for us with both our medications, and he picks it up. This has been going on for seven years.

Last week, I was sick so I didn't realize I was running low on pills. When I got to my last one, I asked my husband whether he needed more pills, too. He told me he'd picked some up that day just for himself! He said he didn't ask me to call because I was sick and he didn't want to bother me. (Cheryl, I was sick, not dead.) When I asked why he didn't get my pills, he sputtered and said a lot of stuff that made no sense.

I don't get it. What was he thinking? — Bewildered

Dear Bewildered: There are several possible answers.

He wanted you dead. Have you taken out a large insurance policy lately?

He was unusually preoccupied. Does he owe the mafia money? Is his girlfriend pregnant? Is his business partner threatening to turn him into the IRS, the SEC or Homeland Security?

He was having a senior moment, except instead of misplacing his keys or not remembering a word, he forgot he had a wife. This happens a lot in Las Vegas.

He was angry. Your sickness inconvenienced him and made him have to call for himself, so consciously or subconsciously, he said to himself, "Let her get her own damn pills."

He just wasn't thinking. Men have a one-track mind. Hungry? Eat. Tired? Sleep. Need pills? Get pills.

He's telling the truth. He didn't want to bother you.

None of the above.

Readers, help Bewildered and me. What do you think her husband was thinking?

Dear Cheryl: I'm divorced and seeing a married man. I don't want him to get divorced. We only see each other about three times a year, but we do text and email. I just can't seem to let him go. He's so nice to me. He's got me hooked.

If he told me this was the end, I'd say OK. But as long as he still wants to talk to me, I'll listen. I tell no one about him because of all the advice I know I'd get. I know I should drop him, but I can't. — I Know; I Know; I Know

Dear I Know; I Know; I Know: There are so many things wrong about an affair with a married man, and you know all of them.

So let's think about whether there's anything positive about this particular one.

Maybe you're actually helping his marriage by providing him with a safety valve. If he knows he can see you occasionally and contact you frequently, he might be nicer to his wife and more committed to his marriage.

The thrill of having a secret life that none of your friends know about might make your everyday life more tolerable.

In the meantime, I hope you don't get caught. I hope his wife doesn't find out and suffer. I hope there are no bad repercussions. I hope having him doesn't stop you from finding a partner, etc.

Got a problem? Send it, along with your questions and rants to [email protected]. And check out my new e-book, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."