Dear Jenny: I'm a 24-year-old, well-educated single guy with a fun, respectable job, and I'm not totally unfortunate-looking (especially with dim lighting and cocktails). Still, I've been single (not by choice) for my entire life — if you don't count three two-week-long relationships. I can't figure out what I'm doing wrong. Help! — Skylar from Santa Fe, N.M.

Jenny says: Well, I can't say for certain what you're doing wrong, but hopefully I can give you a little insight. First and foremost, self-confidence is crucial to having a successful dating life. Believing you are lovable and worthy of a relationship is one of the major ways you can attract someone special into your life.

Women want a man who is confident, a man who knows what he wants, and a man who makes them feel desired. Expressing a bit of power can be conveyed in the way you dress, the way you carry yourself, and the way you talk. But even the simplest expression — a smile — is a powerful way to get noticed. Smiling conveys cheerfulness and confidence, two traits that are highly desired. The clothes you wear and the way you wear them also show you are self-assured. Believe it or not, to a woman, the way a man dresses can convey if he's sloppy, well-groomed, successful or high-maintenance. That might seem a bit shallow, but it's true!

Now, since you've been single most of your life, the greatest shift you can make is in how you approach women. But it's more than just the initial conversation starter — it's about how you understand them, flirt with them and connect with them on a genuine level. Women want to feel physically and intellectually desired as well as respected and cared for. It may seem like a tall order, but it's not. If you really listen and engage in reciprocal conversation, compliment and encourage her, and make her feel sexy and loved, you won't have any problem finding a woman. It may not happen right away — but don't give up! Anything worth having is worth waiting for.

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