Uh oh. Kevin Sorbo reports to New Orleans next month to begin filming a big-screen spoof of "The 300," this year's highly stylized hit rendering of the ancient Battle of Thermopylae in which lots of men in togas fought to the death for glory. Among the legions of fans for the Gerard Butler picture is a sizeable gay audience.

"This is incredibly gay, this movie. It's a stretch for me," says Sorbo of the new comedy. There'll even be a guy-guy kiss involved. "The director said, 'Is this a dealbreaker?' I said, 'It could be. No tongue, or I'll kill the guy.'"

Referring to the takeoff, which is going under the title of "Hunting and Fishing," the one-time "Hercules" star adds, "It's by the guys who did the 'Scary Movies.'" That is, writer-director-producers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, who've collaborated on the "Scary" pics with the Wayans Bros. and others.

Kevin lets us know he plays the captain of the Spartan army in the new movie, which also stars Carmen Electra.

Asked if he's still in good enough shape for a part like that, Sorbo says, "I hope. I'm not a six pack. I'm more of a four pack these days. I don't lift heavy like I used to. I'm not benching 360 anymore."

Sorbo has his first Western coming to the small screen — Hallmark's July 7 "Avenging Angel." The actor, who plays a pastor-turned-bounty hunter, considers it "like 'Pale Rider' meets 'Death Wish.' It was a hoot working on it — a great cast, stunt guys, horse guys, and it was just fun. With my physicality, I'm kind of surprised I didn't get a Western before now," adds Kevin. There's a chance his The Preacher will be the central character in more films for Hallmark, and Sorbo is game.

MEANWHILE: Word from casting sources has it that Friedberg and Seltzer, who are making their comedy for New Regency and Fox, have had their forces on the lookout for look-alikes for Paris Hilton, Kevin Federline, Tyra Banks, Sanjaya, Ryan Seacrest, the three "American Idol" judges, the three "Dancing With the Stars" judges and Sylvester Stallone. Hm. We don't remember anyone like them in 'The 300." Well, maybe Sanjaya.

INSPIRING MINDS: Henry Winkler just got word that his "Barfing in the Backseat: How I Survived My Family Road Trip," which has a July 5 publication date, is hitting No. 6 on the New York Times Best Seller list for kids' books. "I'm over the moon! I've gone from 'Stupid' to my 12th book coming out and becoming a best seller," notes the nice guy star, who drew inspiration for his underachieving Hank Zipzer character from his own travails as a problem student. It wasn't until Winkler's adulthood that he learned he's dyslexic. Now, the Hank Zipzer books he coauthors with Lin Oliver are being adapted as a potential Nickelodeon series.

FROM THE INSIDE LOOKING OUT: "Hairspray's" new star, Nikki Blonsky, who plays Tracy Turnblad in the upcoming New Line Cinema musical, tells us she's just starting to learn the ropes of what goes into a film after it's wrapped. There's certainly no rest for the weary! "I told my mom it feels like more now than when we were making the movie. Before, it was like: wake up, go film it, and come home." Now, with assorted promotional appearances and interviews, "I'm in hair and makeup much longer," says Nikki with a sort of innocent smile often lost to those who've been consumed by the business.

"In the movie, the hairdo had to be the same every day, but when you give me the liberty to do whatever I want with my hair, I go for hours!" she explains.

It's certainly been a whirlwind for the 18-year-old, who was working at Coldstone Creamery when she was chosen for the coveted part in an open casting call. "My life has changed 100 percent. I grew up a very happy kid, but I really just wanted to act and sing," she says. "It's hard because sometimes you don't get that break in life, and it takes amazing people like [director] Adam Shankman to pick you out of the bunch. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here. It has brought that light I wanted in my life." Now Nikki is looking toward the future, but she's not sure of what's to come. "I'm working with my agent on reading scripts. Hopefully I'll find the right project."

TOGETHER AGAIN: With the Florida recount looming in mid-July — that is, HBO's "Recount" recounting of the controversial 2000 presidential election, this time as a movie directed by Sydney Pollack — casting has been underway for a phalanx of faux-famous folks. Governor Jeb Bush and all the Supreme Court members of that time, to name a few. They're also planning to use sound-alikes for George W. Bush and Al Gore.

(With reports by Stephanie DuBois and Emily Feimster)

To find out more about Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith and read their past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.