Q: Apparently, I smell. My son told me as nicely as he could, but the message was clear.

I had no idea but am glad to have been told (even if I'm embarrassed to hear it). I've noticed my sense of smell getting worse with age, but I didn't think it would affect me too much. Sadly, that doesn't seem to be the case.

If I can't tell anymore, how can I keep my odor in check?

A: As seniors lose their sense of smell, it's easy to neglect routine hygiene.

Shower or bathe regularly with gentle soap. Many seniors are afraid of falling in the shower, but some accessibility modifications may help you feel more comfortable.

A good deodorant can do you a world of good. Make sure you're in the habit of applying it every day.

A major source of odor is clothing. Don't re-wear outfits before washing, and do laundry regularly.

Even if you aren't as active during the day, you still sweat and get dirty. Make sure to take wool products to a professional cleaner.

Keep on top of your dental hygiene, especially any dentures or dental bridges (which tend to harbor bacteria). These can be a surprising contributor to smell.

Creating a hygiene routine will help you avoid the uncertainty. — Emma, Doug's granddaughter

INTERGENERATIONAL BONDS

Q: I don't have a close relationship with any of my grandchildren. I've been chalking it up to them being mostly teenagers (they have an age range of 11-16), but that doesn't seem to be it. Apparently, my son's children have a stronger relationship with the other side of the family.

I don't get to see my grandchildren very often and always feel like I'm interrogating them when I do. To get them to talk, I always ask the same questions, and conversations tend to die out quickly.

What am I doing wrong?

A: Teenagers are especially sensitive to being judged by others, and this insecurity can get in the way of having a relationship.

Many grandparents feel like they have to pry to get any information. Don't do it — it puts people off.

To strengthen your bond with teenage grandchildren, do your best to make them feel welcome around you.

A surprisingly common issue with younger family members happens when you have them visit your home. As we get more set in our ways, we feel uncomfortable having chaos introduced into our homes — especially by young people.

If you have expectations for visitors (like removing shoes, avoiding certain rooms, etc.), mention them kindly and ahead of time. Watching your family members like a hawk when they're in your space will put everyone on edge.

When you talk, let your grandchildren lead parts of the conversation. Asking specific questions about their interests and things they enjoy talking about will give you better results.

Young people love feeling like they're experts. Ask them to explain something they enjoy doing.

Most of all, avoid scrutinizing your grandchildren. Accepting them for who they are will help them feel more comfortable with you.

Treating your grandchildren like their opinions are important will encourage them to open up. — Doug

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at [email protected]. Emma, Doug's granddaughter, helps write this column. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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