Q. I've been doing battle with our school district for many years and am hoping you can give me some guidance. My 14-year-old son is a gifted underachiever. He was identified as an "able-learner," particularly in the areas of math and science. However, he was also thought to be ADHD; he didn't concentrate in class, was disruptive, lost his homework, etc.

He had a psychological evaluation in sixth grade that showed above average to superior ranges in a number of areas with no ADHD. When something interested him, he focused for hours. We hoped that he would 'mature' and grow out of this; however, that hasn't happened. At least once a year I go head-to-head about this with the administration and teachers who deal with my son. I've given them articles about underachievement and made requests. All they want to do is make him a better 'student' by teaching him how to study. That fails. He does extremely well on standardized tests, is very verbal and has great skills in music. I'm not saying he's a genius, but he has ability that is not reflected in his grades. He receives D's and F's, even though he had a perfect score on his semester math exam. It's very telling that one can ace a semester exam and still be getting a D as a semester grade. I continue to go in circles with this district. Am I crazy?

As parents, we've tried to get our son to be as hardworking and diligent as we are, but we've finally come to the realization that he's very different. He can talk for hours about a subject, but if you ask him to write it down, you get two poorly written paragraphs. He's a square peg that won't fit into a round hole! A. Your frustration with the school is understandable, but your obvious battle may be doing your son more harm than good. As you continue to blame the school, he may interpret it as permission to not hand in his assignments and unfortunately, it doesn't sound as if the school is hearing your very legitimate concerns.

You need an advocate, perhaps a gifted coordinator or psychologist who has worked with your son. By your description, it sounds as if his abilities are uneven with very strong math skills and struggling writing skills. I usually describe this as a "pencil anxiety" problem, but it's also known as a processing speed problem. That means that writing may have felt embarrassingly difficult for your son since childhood, thus the bad habit of avoiding written work and the excuses. Also, if he truly gets A's on exams after not doing math homework, it appears that he isn't being sufficiently challenged in math and it certainly can be boring doing repetitive work you already know how to do. An advocate might be more successful in arranging more challenging math classes for him. Your son will need to compromise and make a commitment to accomplishing his assignments if they are sufficiently challenging.

Encourage your son to use a computer for as much of his work as possible. Some schools provide Alpha Smart keyboards for students to use for note taking if they struggle with handwriting. There are many other suggestions in my book "Why Bright Kids Get Poor Grades" (3rd ed., Great Potential Press, 2008) to help you and his teachers turn this underachievement around. Believe in your son, but be clear with him that he must be responsible for his work. Try to get further guidance from a counselor who is familiar with working with gifted underachievers.

For free newsletters about underachievement or learning disabilities, send a large self-addressed, stamped envelope to P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI, 53094, or read "Solving the Mysterious Underachievement Problem" at www.sylviarimm.com.

Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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