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Aging Lifestyles by Joe Volz

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Traveling with Relatives

Over the years, we've enjoyed many trips traveling with our relatives. Now, we are older and caught between two generations — our much older relatives and our adult children. And we notice that things have changed over the years.

We're telling you about some of our experiences to pinpoint some of the issues that may arise through the years.

 

KATE'S TRAVELS

In my 30s and 40s, I recall several trips with my father to explore faraway places such as the Holy Land, Greece and Poland.

In Poland, we went to our hotel and dad asked for the rooms we had reserved in advance. Well, the clerk insisted we had no reservation. Though we had the reservation paper with us, he continued to insist that he had no record of our advanced booking.

By myself, I would have been clueless about how to handle that situation. Fortunately, my much-traveled father knew what to do: He took $50 dollars in U.S. money and slipped it to the clerk. It was amazing how quickly the clerk found our reservation.

That trip, under my father's tutelage, I learned how important it was to plan carefully — to always carry reservations confirmations with you and, most importantly, to be prepared to deal with the unexpected.

 

JOE'S TRAVELS

Once my father stopped driving, it was my turn to take the initiative and plan our annual vacations, a task they had previously done. This made me realize that my once-vigorous parents were slowing down and the generational clock had turned around.

On one vacation, I took them to the lovely Victorian town of Cape May, N.J., where we stayed in a delightful Victorian bed and breakfast.

I knew my parents no longer were up to much walking, even though they would never admit it.
Unobtrusively, I planned activities that would not tax their strength. We enjoyed short walks on the boardwalk and sitting to watch the ocean and the passing parade of playful kids, watchful parents and young lovers.

 

TODAY'S TRIPS

Now, as older people ourselves, we realize that the generational clock has come full circle. It is our turn to relinquish trip planning to our adult children.

A memorable trip was with our son, Chris, and his family who arranged to rent a house a few blocks from Rehoboth Beach in Delaware. Our son had slightly different agendas than we did; he wanted to be on the go constantly. Chris rallied the kids at 7 a.m. for tennis or biking most mornings.

They didn't quite understand why we preferred to sleep in and then read the paper leisurely. They accepted the fact, though, and we reluctantly did the same. It was our first acknowledgement that the balance between our two generations had shifted in their favor.

As we look back over the years we've traveled, we realize that there's an ongoing continuum that most of us experience through the years. We start as youngsters with our parents in charge, advance to take over their role in trip planning and, finally, relinquish that role to the next generation.

Recognizing this fact also has its downside. Inevitably, we must face the truth that we no longer are our once-energetic selves and that we prefer being in charge. Turning over that control to the succeeding generation is a loss that we mourn — another reminder that time is marching on.

Shakespeare captured it just right when he said, "men and women are merely players. They have their exits and their entrances. And one man in his time plays many parts."

So, too, is it with us.

E-mail Joe Volz at volzjoe2003@yahoo.com or write to 2528 Five Shillings Rd, Frederick, MD 21701. To find out more about Joe Volz and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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Originally Published on Friday September 26, 2008

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