RELEASE: SUNDAY, JUNE 28, 2015 Editor's Note: Hundreds of Ann Landers' loyal readers have requested that newspapers continue to publish her columns. These letters originally appeared in 1999. Dear Ann Landers: Recently, my husband and I did some extensive remodeling on our home. …Read more. RELEASE: SUNDAY, JUNE 21, 2015 Editor's Note: Hundreds of Ann Landers' loyal readers have requested that newspapers continue to publish her columns. These letters originally appeared in 1999. Dear Ann Landers: Last December, my husband suffered a severe heart attack. The doctor …Read more. RELEASE: SUNDAY, JUNE 14, 2015 Editor's Note: Hundreds of Ann Landers' loyal readers have requested that newspapers continue to publish her columns. These letters originally appeared in 1999. Dear Ann Landers: Our 13-year-old granddaughter, an only child, visited us recently and …Read more. RELEASE: SUNDAY, JUNE 7, 2015 Editor's Note: Hundreds of Ann Landers' loyal readers have requested that newspapers continue to publish her columns. These letters originally appeared in 1999. Dear Ann Landers: Here's another letter about parents who complain that their grown …Read more.more articles
"CLASSIC" ANN LANDERS
Dear Ann Landers: My husband and I just returned from visiting friends and relatives we haven't seen in quite some time. As happens with each visit, we were given a tour of their homes to see the redecorating and remodeling and new furniture. We heard all about their jobs, the clubs to which they belong and the committees on which they serve. We also heard about all their trips and saw several hundred photographs of their children and grandchildren and heard all about the kids' homes, their families, their honors, their accomplishments, etc.
We were not asked a single question about our jobs, our children or our grandchildren, and when we began to talk about them, the topic was quickly changed to something about THEM and THEIRS.
I wonder how many other people behave this way. — Sitka, Alaska
Dear Sitka: I can tell you. Millions. And sad to say, they have no idea they are boring you to death.
It is only human to talk about ourselves and our children's accomplishments, but people of good taste and well-balanced egos ask questions about YOUR family, YOUR job and YOUR involvements. This comes under the heading of being sensitive to the needs of others.
I hope your letter gets a great many people thinking, "Could this be me?"
Dear Ann Landers: I agree with your comments to "Kentucky," who complained that her husband sat in front of the TV every night and wouldn't talk to her. You said conversation is the lifeblood of relationships. I wish you'd address the quality of the conversations.
Are they lectures, litanies of a spouse's shortcomings, nagging about things they can't afford, or carping about projects that need doing? When they are, television or computers are a blessed escape. This is especially true after a grueling day of working and commuting.
What do you say to that, Ann? — Tuned-Out Husband in Virginia
Dear Virginia: I say, amen, brother. Although it has been said TV killed the art of conversation, I still believe people who have something to say are listened to.
Dear Ann Landers: My husband and I are writing this message to our children on behalf of our grandchild, who is 2 years old. Please print it:
Dear Mom and Dad: I know I'm only 2, but I'm no dummy. I know you both love me very much, but I also know you both smoke. I don't want to nag, but smoking is going to take you away from me before I'm finished growing up. And I'm sure you know that secondhand smoke is attacking my tender and growing membranes every day.
As I watch you light up and puff those things, it looks like a very cool thing to do. Even though I know it's not smart, I'll probably start smoking as soon as I can because I see how much you enjoy it.
So, what I really want for Christmas is my future. You spend about $100 every month on cigarettes. If you both would quit smoking now and invest the savings for my college education, I'd be able to go to a great university, and you'd both be around to attend my graduation. Love — Your Child (and His Loving Grandparents in Mich.)
Dear Loving Grandparents: I would very much like to get a letter from the parents of this child saying, "You win. We quit."
When planning a wedding, who pays for what? Who stands where? "The Ann Landers Guide for Brides" has all the answers. Send a self-addressed, long, business-size envelope and a check or money order for $3.75 (this includes postage and handling) to: Brides, c/o Ann Landers, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Suite 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. (In Canada, send $4.55.) To find out more about Ann Landers and read her past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.
ANN LANDERS (R)
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