Close Friends Should Always Remain Close Friends by Dr. Robert Wallace on Creators.com

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Close Friends Should Always Remain Close Friends

DR. WALLACE: Emma and I are both 15 and have been close friends for over 10 years. We have loads of fun together and spend a lot of time at each other's houses. She has a great personality, but when a boy appears and starts talking to us, she turns into a totally different person.

She acts like I'm not even there and hangs on every word the guy says, even if he is also a good friend of mine. I don't want to lose her as a friend, because she is really my best friend, but I don't know how to deal with her when a guy is around. What do you think I should do? — Shelly, Dayton, Ohio.

SHELLY: Awhile back, Teen magazine ran an article about friends who put guys first. Here is their list of do's and don'ts for handling this kind of problem:

— DO talk to her. Let her know how much her friendship means to you and how much it hurts when she treats guys better than she treats you.

— DON'T criticize her by calling her a flake or a flirt. This will only put her on the defensive and may damage your relationship even more.

— DO keep other friends. If you rely on her friendship exclusively, you're just setting yourself up for a big disappointment.

— DON'T take it personally when she puts a guy before you. It may feel like a flat-out rejection, but that's not her intent.

— DO consider making backup plans if you don't feel you can count on your friend to come through.

— DON'T make her feel as if she has to choose between you and a guy.

By including her in your plans and taking an interest in her male relationships, you can help her see that there's plenty of room in her life for both.

Close friends should always remain close friends. Do everything possible to keep it that way.

BLAME IT ON YOUTHFUL EXUBERANCE

DR. WALLACE: In our driver's training class, the teacher stated that a human's reflexes are best between 17 and 20 years of age. If this is fact, why is it that many automobile insurance companies refuse to give us automobile insurance? And why do those that provide insurance, charge teens outrageous prices when, physically, we are the best-qualified drivers? — Nameless, Ames, Iowa.

NAMELESS: It's a fact that human reflexes are best during the late teen years, but having good reflexes doesn't always mean the driver will have safe driving habits.

The problem with teens, especially guys, is that their adventuresome spirit and limited driving experience makes them more of an accident risk. Unfortunately, teen drivers have the highest percentage of accidents because of what I call "youthful exuberance."

Insurance companies are in the business to make a profit and teen policies, for the most part, are not profitable.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.