Ask the average person what he or she would like to be, and many will say they just want to be happy — happy in their home, happy in their job, happy in life. To many, happiness seems "the impossible dream," yet there are several things each of us can do to be happier.

The very first thing people can do to achieve happiness is to come to the complete realization that they have the sole responsibility for their happiness. The bride, or groom for that matter, who not only expects but truly believes that it is her (his) mate's responsibility to keep him or her happy is in for years of bitter disappointment. Self-centeredness is the byproduct of years of living life as a single, so it is not uncommon for couples to enter marriage with the attitude, "I will ask not what I can do for my mate, but only what my mate can do for me." Making your mate's happiness your highest priority — even though you are not responsible for it — will make both of you happier faster.

Dr. Michael Guillen points out that "some of us are wired for singing the blues, and others for singing in the rain." Several studies reveal that regardless of what your natural bent is, you can change from optimism to pessimism and vice versa. When you reach the age of accountability, you can choose to be optimistic or pessimistic, unless there is a chemical imbalance — which you can choose to get treatment for. Feed your mind joyful songs, exciting information, humor and things that generally make you laugh or smile, and you have chosen to be optimistic and will feel happier in the process. Dr. David Myers says that "happiness is chronic." Research shows that people who several years ago said they were "very unhappy" or "happy" tend to state much the same thing today, despite changing circumstances in their lives.

So, what do we do to switch over to the, as Dr. Guillen puts it, "happiness thermostat"? He says, "Scientists suggest to start by exercising, getting plenty of sleep and smiling." He says these simple acts seem to trigger the release of powerful antidepressants like serotonin and dopamine. "It might make your brain begin to glow, and who knows, even make you feel like giggling."

Dr. Guillen also points out that happiness has an effect on your body, and that the latest studies show that if you're depressed, you have a four times greater chance of having a heart attack. Research shows that in happy people, they find the "killer T-cells" in their immune system are far more active than others — those T-cells are what fight disease. They also say that optimists seem to recover much faster from major surgery. In other words, happiness is good for your health, and optimistic people live longer. He also points out that happy people are those who have goals and are working toward something; and that exercise is a mild antidepressant.

There are other factors involved in all of this, but one thing that contributes to happiness is the fact that you are growing. You are learning things today that are important for your life tomorrow. Any feeling of accomplishment increases not only your happiness, but also your confidence, which improves your performance, which makes you more successful in all areas of life — which makes you happier, and so on.

Happy people feel that regardless of what happens today, tomorrow will be better.

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