Girls Should Talk to Mom First About Sex

DR. WALLACE: What do you have against fathers being involved in discussing sexual matters with daughters? You always encourage girls to discuss things sexual with their mothers. Are you not aware that in families, the mother and the father are equals? What would you tell a young lady who wanted sex information who is living with a single-parent father?

My wife and I have two sons and when it came time for them to learn about human reproduction, my wife was just as active in the discussion as I was. Please don't try to drive a wedge between parents when it comes to discussing sex with their children. When it comes to sex, it "takes two to tango," and it takes "two to tango" to teach their children the facts. —Father, Moncton, New Brunswick

FATHER: I never mean to prohibit fathers from discussing sexual matters with their daughters. Fathers should always be included in the discussion because they can contribute significantly in helping clarify sexuality. Conversely, mothers should be included when sons are inquisitive about sexual matters.

But I still feel that girls should talk with their mothers first, before their fathers enter the conversation. There are times when a young girl will shy away from certain personal questions if her father is present. Besides, a mother fully understands the workings of the female body and mind much better than a father does.

It's true that it takes "two to tango," but when one of the partners in this provocative dance is klutzy; it's usually the male, and it makes dancing a chore. If a single parent father needs to discuss sexual matters with a daughter, a female relative, trusted female friend or female doctor or nurse should have the first discussion regarding sex before the father gets involved.