Dear Family Coach: I planned a special project for my 7-year-old daughter and I. I wanted to make a rocking horse for her room. Not long after we started she said she was bored. I was startled and quite a bit hurt. I was so excited to spend time with her, and she clearly wasn't interested. Should I finish the horse on my own or scrap the whole project? — Devastated

Dear Devastated: Don't give up the ship at the first sign of resistance. Maybe the project is more in line with your interests instead of hers. In your question I read, " I planned," " I was so excited" and " I wanted." Nowhere do I pick up on your daughter's voice. It would have been better to score her input before starting the project. Even if you forgot to consider your daughter, it may still be possible to salvage the project. Try taking a break and discussing the plan with her. What are her ideas? You thought to paint the horse, right? Maybe she would go crazy for decoupage. Be flexible, and find a common ground.

One other possibility is that your daughter was testing you by feigning disinterest. Have you started and stopped projects in the past? Do you often commit to a project, but don't follow through? If the answer to these questions is yes, then you need to press on. Don't let your daughter push you away. Try to find a way to get her excited about the project, and keep at it. Even if she doesn't work with you, finish that horse. She still may enjoy the finished product. If she can't appreciate it, though, I am sure a friend or neighbor would be thrilled to receive such a special gift.

Dear Family Coach: I have a spunky, precocious, independent preschooler who will make friends with anyone. With so many disturbing stories in the news lately, it's hard not to be concerned. I want to make she's aware that it's important to be cautious of people we don't know and to stay close within my reach, but I don't want to make her scared of others. When and how do you have the stranger danger talk with your child? — Safety First

Dear Safety: It is absolutely important to teach children about safety. But it is also important to keep the concept of danger in perspective. The vast majority of children are not abducted, molested or otherwise victims of a crime. The vast majority of strangers would not take advantage of your spunky sweetheart. Wouldn't you want her to go up to a stranger and ask for help if she were lost, or if you suddenly became incapacitated and needed assistance? It is important to distinguish that not all strangers are bad.

To help her learn the distinction, teach her that safe strangers are police officers, firefighters, teachers, coaches, principals, nurses, doctors, clergy and even librarians. Talk to her about her inner compass. This compass sends messages when someone seems suspicious. Your daughter should learn to trust her instincts. Instruct her to quickly run from anyone who makes her uncomfortable, asks her to disobey her parents or tells her to keep a secret. Lastly, teach her that she must ask for permission to move out of your sight. This will help you keep watch while she is being exceedingly friendly.

Dr. Catherine Pearlman, the founder of The Family Coach, LLC, advises parents on all matters of child rearing. To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.