Eat your hearts out, East Coasters! While we can hit the beach at the end of December — heck, year-round! — the best you can do is read about it while huddling against the chill and dreaming of that overpriced five-day February package deal to Bermuda.

So, as a public service, let me guide your cold selves to "Pop Surf Culture: Music, Design, Film, and Fashion From the Bohemian Surf Boom" (Santa Monica Press, 272 pages, $39.95) by Brian Chidester and Dominic Priore, with forewords by Billy Al Bengston (fab artist and original Moondoggie — if you have to ask ...) and Kathy Zuckerman (real-life Gidget - -if you have to ask ...).

It's all here: Dick Dale, Mickey Dora, Michael Dormer, Bruce Brown and, of course, surf movies/music/art/clothing and on and on. The essays are well-done and informative, but the real joy is the endless summer of art, photos and illustrations. Heck, there's even a chapter titled "The East Coast Surf Music Scene" for you frigid huddled masses 3,000 miles away.

Eat your hearts out, East Coasters! Gaze upon "Force of Nature: Mind, Body, Soul, and, of Course, Surfing" (Rodale Books, 256 pages, $27.95) and shudder in the presence of the wonder known as Laird Hamilton. (Hey, that shuddering should warm your cold selves up.)

In the oceanic-obsessed world, Hamilton is a force of nature — think Tiger Woods crossed with Babe Ruth with surf god looks thrown in just for fun. Yet this memoir is far more than one man's tales of waves conquered; Hamilton has penned a self-help guide that is divided into mind, body, soul and surfing segments. Hamilton wants us to become "an old wizard: to live a long and fruitful life and have family and be healthy and enjoy the ride."

"Force of Nature" also has short sidebars from a bevy of Hamilton's friends, including fitness guru Don Wildman and Food Network star Giada De Laurentiis. There are self-improvement tips ranging from the psychological and philosophical to the practical and everyday. Feed your head and spice up your life: "Speaking of the ride, why not let it rip, at least a little bit?"

"The Ecco Anthology of Contemporary American Short Fiction" (Harper Perennial, 784 pages, $18.95, paperback) is a living testament to the power of the short story. Emphasis on "living": Editors Joyce Carol Oates and Christopher R. Beha have limited the list to "living writers who are still publishing new work" (knock on wood!), but that list is in no way limited — there are serious contenders here for any American All-Star Lit Team, dead or alive.

Just about every impressive talent from Sherman Alexie to Tobias Wolff is represented. Sad to say, publishing deadlines and the randomness of the universe let at least one dead author into the mix: David Foster Wallace. He and the Infinite Jester are probably sharing a laugh about this right about now.

On the one hand, "The Optimist's Handbook: A Companion to Hope" (Free Press, 125 pages, $16.95) by Niall Edworthy and Petra Cramsie will help you put on a happy face! This collection of uplifting sayings will put a bounce in your step!

On the other hand, "The Pessimist's Handbook: A Companion to Despair" will then stomp on your tootsies and crush your spirit. Same authors, same format, same fun — but the downer side only gets 116 pages to put you in a funk.

Best of all, you get two — two! — books in one. The handbooks are back to back in the same volume. Double your pleasure, double your, er, gloom, for one low price! I'd be delighted if I didn't feel so melancholy!

First a comic book, then a monster hit as a graphic novel, and now "Watching the Watchmen" (Titan Books, 256 pages, $39.95), a book about the birth and development of same by Dave Gibbons, who illustrated the works; Chip Kidd, Eisner award-winning author and designer; and Mike Essl, an author, graphic designer and assistant professor at the Cooper Union School of Art.

This is a behind-the-scenes look, heavy with artwork: the original designs for the characters, pages that were left on the cutting-room floor, sketches, posters and more. Next "Watchmen" incarnation: The Warner Bros. movie should hit screens sometime next year.

For me, the best part of "Monty Python's Tunisian Holiday" (Thomas Dunne Books, 368 pages, $25.95) by Kim Howard Johnson is the forewords by the Pythons: Michael Palin, John Cleese, Eric Idle and Terry Jones. Here's a sample, from Idle: "Kim 'Howard' Johnson was invented by Graham Chapman during an idle moment on the set of 'Life of Brian.' 'Let's invent a person,' he said. 'An American!' said Cleese. 'An American from the Midwest,' chimed in Palin, 'who keeps a daily diary of Python filming. And then doesn't publish it for years and years.' 'Who would believe that?' I remember muttering disgruntedly."

For fans, Johnson's "daily diary" is essential reading (OK, I liked it as well), an inside glimpse of the Python crew at work and of filmmaking in all its, um, glory.

To find out more about Martin Zimmerman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.