The year gone by, oh, what a mess.

It left our language in distress.

The venom of election fuss

With "nasty" insults tortured us.

From Donald Trump came crooked Hils,

While she denounced "deplorables."

He scolded "morons," "hombres" bad,

As "lightweights," "losers," just "so sad."

"Obamacare, repeal, replace"

Became his mantra, fueled his base.

Without a hint of circumspection,

Conjured up a "rigged election."

Exuding chutzpah, brass and pomp,

He vowed that he would "drain the swamp."

The words that haunted Clinton so

Were "servers," "emails," "hard drives." Woe!

As Putin hacked her like a snake,

And stories on the net were "fake,"

No matter whom we voted for,

All these terms became a bore.

Upon election, Trump, with might,

Assured us things would be "alt-right."

And pundits' jargon wouldn't quit:

"Firestorm," "baked-in," "surrogate."

With "drill down," "walk back," "weaponize,"

A "common-sense approach" was wise.

Of "move the needle," "dumpster fire,"

Our "moving parts" began to tire.

And during spring the constant croak heard:

Both conventions might be "brokered."

And every time they mentioned "Brexit,"

Attention spans began to exit.

The p.c. crowd with indignation

Invited us to "conversation"

By holding many "safe-space" sessions

With "trigger warnings," "micro-aggressions."

"Intentional," they're always dreading

"Entitlement" and — no! — "manspreading."

Then business types unleashed their lingo:

"Best practices," "scalable," "bleeding edge" Bingo!

With "thought leaders," "granular," they were "all-in,"

As "stakeholders" really got under our skin.

"Millennials," all "basic" and "woke,"

Dispensed their jargon as they spoke:

Their "ship" means "relationship," "very" is "v,"

"A hundred percent" is now "hundo p."

And that's how our language tried to convey

A year of surprises. What's left to say?

Rob Kyff, a teacher and writer in West Hartford, Conn., invites your language sightings. Send your reports of misuse and abuse, as well as examples of good writing, via e-mail to [email protected] or by regular mail to Rob Kyff, Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.