In the comedy classic "Dumb and Dumber" the beautiful leading lady, played by Lauren Holly, answers a romantic proposal from Jim Carrey's character by telling him the chances of them getting together are one in a million. Carrey lights up with full energy: "You're telling me there's a chance!" The numbers are always important, but not that important. They will be defied thousands of times all over the world this week under the new Aries sun.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You've been known to get drawn into the entertainment of an irresistible love story, either through media or a friend's experience. This time the story is your own, as the week focuses on a vibrant passion that may or may not be romantic in nature. Projects can be as engrossing as people!
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Franz Kafka complained, "Time is short, my strength is limited, the office is a horror, the apartment is noisy, and if a pleasant, straightforward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle maneuvers." Such "subtle maneuvers" will be your talent this week. You'll be legendary for them!
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Your predictions will be accurate. Your friends and loved ones will behave true to form, in particular the form you have come to learn they actually are (and not the form you thought they fit into when you first met, which was largely, as it turns out, a figment of your hopeful and active imagination).
CANCER (June 22-July 22). The story is bigger than any one person's feelings. This week involves you in things that are about you and not about you. It will often be hard to tell the difference. Your feelings count, but how much? When it comes to making plans and decisions, you'll find that emotion is not your end-all-be-all determining factor.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Your life will be improved by the influences you allow to move you. This week's sunshine comes in the form of a person. You'll be especially touched by one who seems doubly grateful for half the blessings. Though this manner of calculating things is unusual, it's actually the kind of good math that all should be using.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The good life is all there for you in your current environment. Each of your five senses has subcategories to take you into a more vivid experience of things. With the cosmic gift of heightened awareness, to live more fully you don't need to go anywhere or become anything other than what you already are.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Just because something is considered wise — or smart or sacred, even — doesn't mean it's for you. There are wise, smart and holy people out there who cannot possibly relate to you or your story. That's why you should consider stepping up to speak to and create for the people who are like you. There are so many of them!
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Your experiences will fall into two categories: "how it happened" and "how it really happened." You'll be keenly aware of your own bias. Part of you is loyal to that, sticking with your unreasonable interpretations and disproportionate feelings even as a more mature part of you assembles the bigger picture.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You'll be able to focus without distraction on work that's demanding. You'll reach an entrancing state — a state that allows you to enter the world of your project, absorb complicated information and do what it takes to become a master of the realm.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Money is not the only scale. Keep this in mind all week. Just because a person is being paid for what they do doesn't mean that the person is more successful or purposeful or meaningful than a person who isn't getting paid for it. It only means that they are offering an item that others are willing to trade money for.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). If you have the choice between a personal trainer and a funny person, choose the latter. The funny people are more vital to your well-being than health professionals. Laughter is cardio for your insides — oxygenating for the mind and body, invigorating for the spirit.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You're a sensual being, easily hooked by the promise of comfort, beauty in many forms, exciting tastes and whatever brings warm, lovely emotions to the surface. Consult a discerning friend in your decision-making process, as you'll be extremely (or overly) generous when left to your own devices.
THIS WEEK'S BIRTHDAYS: You are wonderful, and it is not necessary for you to hear it from anyone else. You feel it down deep as you do the brave work — the kind no one else can do for you. You will make the great discovery that you are the cure for whatever has ailed you. Invest carefully and incrementally through the next 10 weeks. You'll meet important contacts at a celebration or business event in May. Produce something new in June: You'll be able to sell it for more than you thought possible.
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