Classic Annie's Mailbox from Creators Syndicate Creators Syndicate is an international syndication company that represents cartoonists and columnists of the highest caliber. en Wed, 26 Jun 2019 06:02:39 -0700 Classic Annie's Mailbox from Creators Syndicate 248ef3d82914b7bb4aa64f28d27207e7 Flighty Stepdaughter Might Have To Stay that Way for 06/28/2019 Fri, 28 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p></p><p>Dear Annie: My wife and I are in our late 60s and have been married for six years. We were both widowed. We have a great deal in common and are happy together. </p> <p>Our one bone of contention is her daughter. "Justine" is in her late 30s, married and living overseas. Yet every time she visits, she expects to get picked up and dropped off at the airport, despite the major problems that driving both ways can cause for us. Hints that she might want to get a taxi are blissfully ignored. <p>Updated: Fri Jun 28, 2019</p> d337ada608f27aaf86107a5113b80da2 Difficult Truths Best Told Honestly and Without Bitterness for 06/26/2019 Wed, 26 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: My husband had an affair for three years. I had no idea this was going on until he told me and filed for divorce.</p> <p>We have two teenage children, and I haven't talked very much with them about the situation. I've never mentioned his girlfriend. I don't even know whether he is still seeing the woman. </p> <p>My daughter, who is 18, told me that she's been asked by others whether one of us cheated and that's why we are divorcing. I skirted the question and asked how she replied to this, and she said, "I told them it was none of their business." She never asked me outright whether this is what happened in our case, so I didn't tell her.<p>Updated: Wed Jun 26, 2019</p> 557a5d62ba249d4996edd215e86a06b4 Spreading PTSD Awareness for 06/25/2019 Tue, 25 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I was an army medic who served two deployments in Iraq and saw more than two years' worth of war injuries. Seeing injured soldiers, many of them young, maimed and seriously wounded, while also being concerned for your own life can have an impact on you long after you are out of the situation.</p> <p>After my second deployment, I relocated to SanaFrancisco for a fresh start. It turned out that the busy city, with its noises and crowds, was extremely difficult, and I started feeling depressed and anxious, having panic attacks if people got too near. </p> <p>When a homeless man tapped my shoulder while I was waiting for a train, my reaction was so strong that I nearly threw him on the tracks. When a bus I was riding turned a corner and a can rolled by, the sound made me think I was about to be impacted by an IED explosion. Even the humming noise of a lot of people brought back memories of mass casualties, as did certain smells. <p>Updated: Tue Jun 25, 2019</p> f3254abb3f0cb0b761f57edda84c554e Lay Off the 3-Year-Old's Facebook Pics for 06/24/2019 Mon, 24 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I am the thrilled stepgrandmother of a wonderful grandson, age 3. I've had the privilege of taking care of him twice a week since he was born. </p> <p>I decided to post his pictures on Facebook because his extended family lives all over the country and appreciates the updates on his outings and activities. I also enjoy having a computerized photo book not only for myself, but to share with my housebound mother.</p> <p>The problem is, one family member seems to post only negative remarks about him. Her comments have included criticisms of his baby blanket, his potty training and the length of his hair. She never compliments the boy or makes any positive comments at all.<p>Updated: Mon Jun 24, 2019</p> fbf73a78fb52f007d1762bebcefb868a Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/23/2019 Sun, 23 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I have several cousins who are celebrating weddings and baby showers this summer. Several of my aunts will not attend any of these events if they are not held in a Catholic Church. They say it is against their "rules." One aunt sent a reply saying she would not attend the outdoor wedding because it was not being held in a church. Another aunt replied to a wedding shower invitation that she would not attend it at a Lutheran church hall because it was not her religion. </p> <p>I find these replies to be quite rude and judgmental. Should something be said? Should we ignore it? Should future invitations not be sent? &#8212; Wisconsin</p> <p>Dear Wisconsin: Catholic weddings are supposed to take place in a church, officiated by a priest. If your aunt will not attend any wedding that is not sanctioned by the church (generally meaning an interfaith marriage), please respect that. And while that is not a problem with wedding showers, there are those who will not enter the place of worship of a different religion. That, too, is their choice. These religious restrictions don't leave a great deal of room for compromise. <p>Updated: Sun Jun 23, 2019</p> bd3597e1df2975c56a071e41b49edf67 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/22/2019 Sat, 22 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: My husband and I are middle-aged empty nesters. A few years ago, we sold our old place and built our dream home. The problem is our neighbors have three young boys who can't seem to stay out of our yard. </p> <p>We spent a fortune planting and landscaping, and they walk through our flower gardens and mulch beds and climb on our newly planted trees. I recently heard that the neighbors are adopting two Yorkshire terrier puppies. I can only expect that the dogs will follow the boys into our yard. </p> <p>These boys play with the children who live on the other side of our house. (Those kids are not a problem.) <span class="column--highlighted-text">We have asked the parents to have the boys walk the perimeter of our yard or use the sidewalk to reach their friends, but the kids seem clueless, and the mother appears overwhelmed.</span> <p>Updated: Sat Jun 22, 2019</p> f6602e5fe6f8884b62d727daf96f9914 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/21/2019 Fri, 21 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I am a 61-year-old woman. I am retired, and I live off of my investments, which generate enough income for me to live comfortably. I have paid off my mortgage on the home in which I've lived for 30 years. </p> <p>I've known "Joseph" for 25 years, but we have only begun dating in the past six months. Despite having a high-paying job, Joseph has only a quarter of the assets that I have. He is talking marriage, but I'm afraid if we later divorce and divide our combined assets, I would no longer be able to afford to stay in my house.</p> <p>I love Joseph, but I worry about this. <span class="column--highlighted-text">He let his ex-wife handle all of their finances and, as a result, has little in the way of retirement savings.</span> He also still works in a job where he can stay for many more years &#8212; whereas, if we divorce, I'd have trouble finding a job that would pay enough to live decently. <p>Updated: Fri Jun 21, 2019</p> 2860d394aff32a7362a97e9d5da3a605 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/20/2019 Thu, 20 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: My husband of four years insists on keeping a picture of his cat as the screensaver on his cellphone. Occasionally, he'll switch it out for a photo of one of his kids, but the cat always comes back as the "top dog." It's never a picture of me. </p> <p>"Fluffy" also enjoys the top priority in other areas of our life. For instance, the day I had major surgery, my husband dropped me off at the front door of the hospital and then took Fluffy to the vet and spent the day with her. I am not ranting about some minor grievance. I was in surgery for seven hours, so this was serious. </p> <p><span class="column--highlighted-text">The cat gets better treatment than I do and a lot more affection.</span> If it weren't for my allergies, Fluffy would be sleeping with us. Even so, I've awakened to find the cat's rear end next to my face. I find this disgusting. I even have to wait to use the bathroom to get ready for work, because my husband and Fluffy are having "bonding time." <p>Updated: Thu Jun 20, 2019</p> f220c950291083e9ffc73fce13a6d9f4 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/19/2019 Wed, 19 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I believe my husband is having an emotional affair with his employee "Tina." All the signs are there. </p> <p>My husband's office phone accidentally dialed me while he was talking with Tina at work, and I overheard their conversation. He called her terms of love. I started snooping and discovered that they text each other hundreds of times a month. He lets her know when I'm away from the house so she can call him directly. Tina is the first person he calls on his way to work and the last person he calls on his way home. It used to be me. </p> <p>We've been married for 18 months, but we are not kids. We are in our 50s. I'm stunned by his behavior. When I confronted him, he said he isn't doing anything wrong because nothing physical has happened between them. Since then, he's become more secretive and won't discuss it at all. <p>Updated: Wed Jun 19, 2019</p> 5af58060b20eaf97e38ef38de5d023a2 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/18/2019 Tue, 18 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: My husband calls me the "Throwaway Queen." I have gotten into hot water for not asking before I trashed something. Now I think I've made a huge mistake. </p> <p>My husband is now far into dementia. We are thinking of moving, so I started cleaning out storage bins. I threw away two items of my husband's that had been in those bins for years. Last week, his son came over to help clear out some things and specifically asked for the items I tossed. They apparently were of sentimental value to him. </p> <p>I acted as if I hadn't a clue what he was talking about, but I feel so guilty and ashamed. This is a burden on my conscience, and I don't know what to do. I don't want to keep lying to him, but I'm afraid of confessing. What should I do? &#8212; Stepmom in California<p>Updated: Tue Jun 18, 2019</p> 47312e8b62d2a96f20dcbd1dce9645d4 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/17/2019 Mon, 17 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I have been married for four years. In that time, we have split up twice, and it wasn't pretty either time. We have kids together. I pushed getting married when I became pregnant at 19. Then he claimed to fall out of love with me, stopped coming home after work and began treating me like his maid. So I left and took our child. He followed me and swore he'd do better. The second time we split, we fought so much that things were being thrown and our throats were sore from screaming at each other. For the (now two) kids' sake, I said we can't keep fighting and left again.</p> <p>Here's the problem now. While we were separated, I fell deeply in love with a married man. We would talk about our troubled lives and build each other up. <span class="column--highlighted-text">Every time I see him, the feeling is like thunder in my heart.</span> But for the sake of our marriages and our children, we went back to our spouses. That was mainly his choice, and although I hung on his every word with disappointment, I agreed. </p> <p>It's been a year since my husband and I reconciled, and I stopped speaking to the other man. But I wake up with him on my mind, and he's in my thoughts 24/7. What's wrong with me? &#8212; Guilty Conscience <p>Updated: Mon Jun 17, 2019</p> bd414b8f7079dba021fc3b4566db4d55 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/16/2019 Sun, 16 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: As a father of three, I always find Father's Day a little misleading. Kids don't have to purchase an overpriced card or tie to show their appreciation. I'd rather they simply keep doing what they are already doing: working hard in school. They don't have to be scholars or make the honor roll every time. Just doing their best is good enough for me. So this is for my kids:</p> <p>I appreciate hearing from teachers and others what a great kid you are and the fact that you treat others in accordance to the Golden Rule. I appreciate when you mow the lawn or help Mom with the groceries and that you are just a terrific person in general. I like it when you talk to me about your day and the issues you face, be it in school, sports or life. </p> <p>Today is simply another Sunday, because every day is Father's Day to me. <span class="column--highlighted-text">I think I speak for most dads out there and can tell you it's what your children do every day that matters.</span> Thanks, kids, for another great year of fatherhood. &#8212; Wisconsin Dad <p>Updated: Sun Jun 16, 2019</p> a1a51bfbfc7fccd0e0ceb8d1be9b5676 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/15/2019 Sat, 15 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I have been with "Robert" for three years, and we have been through a lot. We've always had financial issues, but six months ago, we had to give up our baby girl for adoption because we couldn't care for her properly. </p> <p>Emotionally, this has destroyed both of us, but thankfully, I began going to counseling early on, and it has helped. Robert, however, focused on work and is ignoring his feelings on this matter. He has few friends and confided in only one (who was also his boss), who then began bullying Robert. </p> <p>Robert feels very isolated and was hospitalized for severe depression and put on suicide watch. He is currently on medication and waitlisted for counseling. Robert has never been much of a talker, and I fear he will lie or stop going and miss out on the help he needs. <span class="column--highlighted-text">Since leaving the hospital, he has been getting progressively worse: screaming, breaking items in our home, crying randomly and cutting out what few friends he has left.</span> He refuses to speak to his family. <p>Updated: Sat Jun 15, 2019</p> d2da33c37a5e3bab154678be12d52f16 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/14/2019 Fri, 14 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: Is there such a thing as an addiction to charitable giving? I cannot seem to say no to anyone with a need or a hard-luck story. </p> <p>I give generously to my church, wildlife organizations, cancer funds, firefighter causes and on and on. I give to a number of animal charities. Most folks will drop a dollar or two in the Salvation Army kettles at Christmas. I'm the one who puts in $20 every time I pass one. I also derive pleasure from handing some stranger a $10 bill and instructing them to have lunch on me. I do this at least once a week. I also tip quite well.</p> <p>All of this generosity would not be a bad thing, but I now find myself in debt because I give cash away right and left. How do I cut back? &#8212; Overdoing the Tithing <p>Updated: Fri Jun 14, 2019</p> 73384be5609e2ebf41af6c58fd289349 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/13/2019 Thu, 13 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I am in my mid-20s and have been with my husband for seven years. Last year, while I was attending school and working, my husband started an affair. I also discovered information about his cheating dating back three years. I have found texts, social media messages and even a secret phone.</p> <p>My husband doesn't know that I am aware of his affair. We have a toddler, and I don't know what to do. <span class="column--highlighted-text">I cannot believe the man I love has been unfaithful for so long and I just found out about it.</span> </p> <p>I am seriously contemplating divorce, but I feel as if there is more to it. I think my husband may be a sex addict. This is how his father treated his mother for years, and maybe it's all he knows. I want to get him the help he needs, but I'm not sure how to handle the situation. &#8212; A Nurse in Need <p>Updated: Thu Jun 13, 2019</p> f156c7c10361edf543ff60d9a9891cdf Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/12/2019 Wed, 12 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I've known "Ted" all my life. About 10 years ago, I loaned him $1,000. He never repaid it, and I could really use that money now. Ted lives in a different city, and when I phone him, he refuses to discuss it.</p> <p>In the past, I had given Ted money outright, but this was absolutely a loan. I made sure he knew that, but I didn't ask for a promissory note or any interest. If I hire a lawyer to sue him for the loan, I'd lose half the money paying the lawyer. </p> <p>Ted's mother once warned me not to loan money to friends. What can I do? &#8212; Should Have Listened<p>Updated: Wed Jun 12, 2019</p> 4c0bb5ca3bdde3ba7df684efa03c0789 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/11/2019 Tue, 11 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: After my parents died, my sister, "Estelle," moved into our old family home. Three siblings own the house, but Estelle and her husband have lived there for the past six years, rent-free. </p> <p>There were always a lot of cats in our neighborhood, and my mother used to put out food for them. Estelle now does the same, and it seems every cat in the area has migrated to our property. There are at least 30. My sister has named them all and spent a fair amount of money on veterinary bills. Worse, she now lets the cats inside the house, and they are everywhere. The backyard is one big litter box. Her husband doesn't care. He's at his office all day. </p> <p>Estelle spends her entire day feeding and cleaning up after these cats. I worry that they will pick up some disease from the skunks and raccoons that hang around the yards. I recently noticed that she has covered the cooktop, and I don't think she uses it anymore. She showed me a picture of a dozen cats roaming over the kitchen table. She thought it was delightful.<p>Updated: Tue Jun 11, 2019</p> 0a97fec64e432e629f6695013d1737c3 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/10/2019 Mon, 10 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I have two adult daughters, both married now. "Beth" lives nearby, but "Gina" moved across the country. </p> <p>Beth was diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar disorder when she was in her early 20s. I think she suffered from it during childhood but was undiagnosed. When they were children, I spent a great deal of time trying to calm Beth down and was aware that Gina did not get the same degree of attention. I tried to make up for it by doing things with Gina outside of the house. I became her Brownie troop leader and went on her class field trips. I made it my business to see that we had calm times together. </p> <p>Now that Beth is on medication, she is a different person. But it may be too late. Gina doesn't want to come home anymore because she says she doesn't feel safe here. Gina tells me that she is being treated for PTSD due to verbal abuse and neglect she suffered as a child. She says I should have done a better job of protecting her. She hasn't spoken to Beth in two years. <span class="column--highlighted-text">I respect her feelings, but I don't understand why she cannot forgive Beth knowing how ill she was.</span> <p>Updated: Mon Jun 10, 2019</p> d60f32744957cdf5d153b40d28924c70 Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/09/2019 Sun, 09 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I am 13, and my parents are divorced. I moved in with my father eight months ago, but soon realized that Dad is an alcoholic. We lived in a nice apartment for a while, and he seemed to be doing well, but I had no idea how addicted he was until the landlord evicted us. I moved in with my aunt and will have to move back in with my mother soon.</p> <p>Dad is not my biological father, but he raised me. He's the only father I've known. But I think he's trying to buy my love. He never leaves me alone and is always telling me how much better things will be. But he's lying to my face. I happen to know that when he tells me he's at work, he's drinking at a bar.</p> <p>I don't want to discuss it with him. <span class="column--highlighted-text">If he wants to be in my life, he has to quit drinking. Otherwise, I'm done with him.</span> Am I wrong? &#8212; Nevada <p>Updated: Sun Jun 09, 2019</p> dc9dbc626f93f3e90f813e71c052499c Classic Annie's Mailbox for 06/08/2019 Sat, 08 Jun 2019 00:00:00 -0700 <p>Dear Annie: I was widowed five years ago when my husband of 23 years died after a long illness. My four kids (the oldest from a previous marriage) still grieve to this day. "George" always considered my eldest daughter to be his child. Two years after George died, I married a wonderful man who respects the memory of my late husband. George's family embraced him. Or so I thought. </p> <p>Recently, George's two sisters excluded us from a family get-together when an out-of-town sibling was visiting. I had invited everyone to my home via email, but the sisters claim they never saw it. Even so, they insisted the evening was "just for siblings." My kids thought their aunts and uncles were coming to our house and even took off of work to be here. <span class="column--highlighted-text">George's mother was not happy that we were excluded, and neither was the visiting sibling, but neither will rock the boat.</span> </p> <p>These two sisters give the distinct impression that they have no interest in a relationship with my oldest child or me because we are not "blood related." But this hurts my other children, too, and is causing a great deal of misery. <p>Updated: Sat Jun 08, 2019</p>