The Science Advice Goddess from Creators Syndicate https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon Creators Syndicate is an international syndication company that represents cartoonists and columnists of the highest caliber. en Mon, 08 Mar 2021 09:46:31 -0800 https://www.creators.com/ http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss The Science Advice Goddess from Creators Syndicate https://cdn.creators.com/features/the-advice-goddess-thumb.jpg https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon 4e0c73aabaae46fcce7b4dea5baf758c Old Is The New Black for 03/02/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/03/21/old-is-the-new-black Tue, 02 Mar 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p></p><p><i>What are your thoughts on women who are involved with much younger men? A friend who's my age, 58, is dating a 23-year-old guy. She started seeing him when he was 18 and refers to him as her "husband." I went on a day trip with the two of them, and it honestly felt like we had a child in tow. He whines and pouts to get his way, feels a need to one-up everybody in conversation, and says and does weirdly inappropriate things (like skipping through a graveyard and talking openly about his sexual prowess). They profess their love to each other often, and I guess if it's working, it's fine, but I just don't get it. </i></p><i> </i><p><i>&#8212;Baffled</i><p>Updated: Tue Mar 02, 2021</p> 6be4e493a9e91b57c1c1f4e099dabe15 Job Corpse for 02/23/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/02/21/job-corpse Tue, 23 Feb 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>My girlfriend of a year is beautiful, intelligent, sweet, and loving and the first woman I could see having a future with. Last week, I was told I'm being laid off from my job at a large media conglomerate. I haven't told anyone, but I'm feeling increasingly guilty for keeping it a secret from my girlfriend. The thing is I'm afraid she'll think less of me, even if she pretends not to. To be honest, I'd rather break up with her than tell her. </p> <p>&#8212;Distraught</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Feb 23, 2021</p> 76c430afc5534c72d5ac01c8636c3c03 Stare Way To Heaven for 02/16/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/02/21/stare-way-to-heaven Tue, 16 Feb 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I'm a girl in my early 20s, and I recently started dating a guy I met in college. I'm very happy, except for one issue: For as long as I've known him, he's followed Instagram accounts of attractive women with provocative photos (ranging from half-naked to entirely naked), and he'll "like" these pics. This really bothers me; however, I don't want to be the overbearing girlfriend. Why does he do this, and does it matter? </p> <p>&#8212;Disturbed</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Feb 16, 2021</p> cf522abaa3d8b7558e99c75049675371 Blarenaked Ladies for 02/09/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/02/21/blarenaked-ladies Tue, 09 Feb 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>Whenever I feel like I click with someone, I want to be upfront and tell them I like them right away. My friends all say this is dating suicide (and that's how it's been working out for me). But if I'm looking for emotional honesty in a partner, shouldn't I lead with it? </p> <p>&#8212;Confused</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Feb 09, 2021</p> 24dcce878ed05db18cc466ac1dc1cad3 Ancestry Dot Con for 02/02/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/02/21/ancestry-dot-con Tue, 02 Feb 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I'm a single woman in my mid-30s with an older half brother I haven't seen in 20 years. He started calling me several years ago, and we speak sporadically (always instigated by him). He's married and refers to me as the aunt to his four children (whom I've never met). Recently, he asked whether they could all stay with me for a while. On the next call, he asked to borrow money. I have yet to give him answers. I can't help but suspect he just intended to use me all along. Is there a way to figure out whether that was the case? If so, I really don't want anything to do with him.</p> <p>&#8212;Wary</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Feb 02, 2021</p> 956737e843d66578cb2eb0c1f7ab7079 Laddy Issues for 01/26/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/01/21/laddy-issues Tue, 26 Jan 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I'm a woman in my early 20s. My friends say I have "daddy issues," because I tend to date men in their 30s. (I do have a decent relationship with my dad). I find men in their 20s generally immature, slobby, and inconsiderate, with limited communication skills (and no desire to improve them). I can't see how being frustrated with that means there's something wrong with me, but I hear "daddy issues" so much I'm starting to wonder.</p> <p>&#8212;Annoyed</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Jan 26, 2021</p> bd8aede5a36fa45084b0ea6744cd157d Emily Postal for 01/19/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/01/21/emily-postal Tue, 19 Jan 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>Bright red lipstick is my trademark. It makes me feel attractive and confident: ready to take on the world. A female friend criticizes me at parties about my leaving a lipstick mark on my glass, even when it's a plastic cup. She says it's disgusting, often when guys are listening. Is this her problem or bad etiquette I need to change? </p> <p>&#8212;Girl Unpowered</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Jan 19, 2021</p> f81cb87f6d400098961737981d83b5e1 Couching Tiger for 01/12/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/01/21/couching-tiger Tue, 12 Jan 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I'm a woman in my late 20s in a happy, committed relationship. I had the idea of going to a therapist with my boyfriend so we can learn to communicate better, etc. Friends I've told about this see it as a sign of "trouble in paradise." Is it possible I'm in denial and there's something wrong between my boyfriend and me?</p> <p>&#8212;Unsettled</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Jan 12, 2021</p> 092199329ead0202b47da328a52889d9 Meet Joe Slack for 01/05/2021 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/01/21/meet-joe-slack Tue, 05 Jan 2021 00:00:00 -0800 <p></p><p><i>My boyfriend does everything halfway, save for playing video games and smoking weed. He does sloppy work at his job, just the minimum to get by, and is always late turning things in. He's gotten away with this so far, maybe because he's charismatic and fun. In our relationship, he'll promise me one thing and do another, and he does sneaky-lazy things like using up my shampoo but leaving the empty bottle in the shower. He's highly intelligent and could be so much better than this. Is there a way to get him to change? </i></p><i> </i><p><i>&#8212;Disappointed Girlfriend</i><p>Updated: Tue Jan 05, 2021</p> 40abdd959b3231bd71ef24a75b2b16c2 Drop Dud, Gorgeous for 12/29/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/12/20/drop-dud-gorgeous Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I typically avoid conflict to keep from having ugly conversations. I'm in an unhappy relationship, and it's clearly not fixable. I always rely on the other person to end a relationship, even when it's making me really miserable. Why do I do this, and how do I change?</p> <p>&#8212;Stuck Girl</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Dec 29, 2020</p> 3aedbb02b12adf38c6328edbc5b21554 Adoptee Strainer for 12/22/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/12/20/adoptee-strainer Tue, 22 Dec 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>My boyfriend, who was adopted as an infant, just heard from his birth mom for the first time ever. She contacted him out of the blue, sending a perfectly nice message, not expecting anything from him. Instead of responding to it, he's just sort of shutting down. Times are tough enough, and I don't think it's healthy to bottle up his feelings. However, whenever I point that out or ask him how he feels, he says he doesn't want to talk about it. How can I help motivate him to process his feelings?</p> <p>&#8212;Caring Girlfriend</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Dec 22, 2020</p> 94ffa02779a7e3e9a4121c62160e2a81 Flee Bites for 12/15/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/12/20/flee-bites Tue, 15 Dec 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I broke up with my boyfriend because he didn't prioritize our relationship and wouldn't commit. He now wants to get back together and has been sending me cards and letters for weeks. Is it foolish to give him another shot? </p> <p>&#8212;Red Flag?</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Dec 15, 2020</p> 8d032dfaf2ad4e978fd4ad6e7816dd7c Knight Vision for 12/08/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/12/20/knight-vision Tue, 08 Dec 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p></p><p><i>My boyfriend is very successful, with a high-profile job in finance. He's very romantic, and I felt I'd found "the one." However, he has cheated on previous girlfriends, is unusually protective of his phone around me, and otherwise acts secretively. For example: He began disappearing for three hours on Wednesday nights. He didn't return any texts, which is unlike him. He claimed he was at "therapy," forgetting he'd told me he instead uses life coaches at his job. Another example: I stopped over one morning and saw remains of a pizza and a dainty box of sparkly champagne gummy bears (not exactly a man's snack). After I called him on these incidents, he began texting me periodically on Wednesday nights and stockpiling cheap drugstore gummies, which he eats when I'm over. He has angrily denied he's seeing other women and refuses to discuss it further. I'm in love with him, and I want to believe him. </i></p><i> </i><p><i>&#8212;Benefit Of The Doubt?</i><p>Updated: Tue Dec 08, 2020</p> f8ed4d5892481568fecf1c1524bfe0a8 Son Of Clam for 12/01/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/12/20/son-of-clam Tue, 01 Dec 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>Getting my boyfriend to talk to me about his feelings seems impossible. I know guys tend not to be super emotive, but trying to get a read on what he's feeling is like trying to understand a foreign language. How can I get him to open up to me? </p> <p>&#8212;Distressed</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Dec 01, 2020</p> 184d812c7d4864830cab3bc2ad86f66a Apt. 201B Or Not To Be for 11/24/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/11/20/apt-201b-or-not-to-be Tue, 24 Nov 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>My boyfriend and I have been together for two years, and my lease is up in a few months. I was thinking about asking him if he wants to live together. When is the right time to move in with someone, and how do you know whether that's even a good idea? </p> <p>&#8212;Housing Crisis</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Nov 24, 2020</p> d599e4a4f8e983d4e2edb961742d82a9 Grand Theft Autocrat for 11/17/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/11/20/grand-theft-autocrat Tue, 17 Nov 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p><i>I'm a 29-year-old straight woman, and I recently started dating this guy I really like. The only issue is he seems a bit controlling. For example, he always wants to pick the restaurant and which TV show we watch. While I'm generally pretty go with the flow, it seems like I never choose what we're doing. It's one thing to pick the restaurant, but I worry that he might be like this with bigger things (like if we got a place together or got married). Should I be worried? </p> <p>&#8212;Unsure</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Nov 17, 2020</p> 8eef6eba69ff48ffc16fb5bef1beba64 Fickle-Down Economics for 11/10/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/11/20/fickle-down-economics Tue, 10 Nov 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p></p><p><i>I'm a 29-year-old straight woman. I recently came to the odd conclusion that I have no idea what I want in a man. Over the past few years, I've been dating a variety of guys and hoping they'll be right for me, and it's not working. Some turn out to be nice guys, but some turn out to be jerks. One turned out to be a truly terrible person, but in hindsight, all were obviously wrong for me. In each case, the underlying problems were always there, but I didn't identify them until things blew up months into the relationship or even a year in. How can I get clear on what I want?</i></p><i> </i><p><i>&#8212;Lost</i><p>Updated: Tue Nov 10, 2020</p> 46456cbafd2323013e9e195032fdf3a8 At Debt's Door for 11/03/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/11/20/at-debts-door Tue, 03 Nov 2020 00:00:00 -0800 <p></p><p><i>Quarantine's been weighing on me, and I've been making a lot of unnecessary purchases. I know I need to stop wasting money, but I just keep ordering thing after thing. How can I get that satisfaction from buying something without actually buying it?</i></p><i> </i><p><i>&#8212;Going Broke</i><p>Updated: Tue Nov 03, 2020</p> a2d4f2cf905ca6997e9f484d4da2c9b7 Heavy Mental for 10/27/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/10/20/heavy-mental Tue, 27 Oct 2020 00:00:00 -0700 <p><i>I'm a woman who recently stopped talking with a guy I'd been seeing because, frankly, I didn't find him intelligent enough. He is a good guy, but just a little dim for me. When I told my friends this was the reason I ended things, they said it was a bit snobbish. Does this make me an intellectual snob? I get that he has other good qualities, but I just don't feel like they're enough. </p> <p>&#8212;Nerd Seeking Nerd</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Oct 27, 2020</p> 3e2302e2e960add20c4de01a1d4982fa Coddle Herder for 10/20/2020 https://www.creators.com/read/advice-goddess-amy-alkon/10/20/coddle-herder Tue, 20 Oct 2020 00:00:00 -0700 <p><i>My boyfriend's enabling of his failure-to-launch 26-year-old son is seeming like a deal breaker. Though his son's very likable, he's been fired from every job he's had, including a well-paying delivery job I recently got him, after they perceived liability from his reckless, race-driving ways. His dad lent him a truck, pays the insurance, pays his cellphone bill, and keeps rescuing him on his rent. He spends his days video gaming, getting stoned, and online dating. I was looking forward to getting married, but I don't want my house at risk when his son calls for a bailout. I'm also not sure I want a man who doesn't advance his kids to independence.</p> <p>&#8212;Distressed</i></p> <p><p>Updated: Tue Oct 20, 2020</p>