Hangover Schmangover

By Pete Kaminski

September 19, 2014 4 min read

Hangs can be painful. The hijinks of the night before are always fun, but waking up Sunday morning with a throbbing, parched, shrinking brain never is. Fortunately, the cure for this condition is found in the kitchen.

The keys to both avoiding and curing a hangover are in the amount of food and water you consume. Before drinking, you should always eat a hearty meal and drink plenty of water.

But let's face it; you can't always control when the time to party calls. So when you do wake up in the morning feeling your worst, hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. The best trick to knocking out a hangover is to flush the alcohol out of your system. Drink plenty of water, but orange juice or Powerade. Powerade is awesome. Juices and sports drinks give your deprived, starved body important nutrients that water cannot provide. Vitamins and electrolytes help replenish and kick start your brain and body. It is important to consume liquids first; alcohol can be very tough on your stomach. Also, depending on how sick you are feeling, you may only be able to handle a liquid diet during the first few hours after you wake up from your coma. If you wake up and drink some water and feel queasy, you should probably take it easy for a little while longer.

Once you are feeling fairly good, it's time to feast! According to Elin Roberts, of Newcastle University's Centre for Life, "food doesn't soak up the alcohol but it does increase your metabolism helping you deal with the after-effects of overindulgence." The beauty of being hungover is that you just have to eat whatever you are craving. I personally think that the more artery-clogging and greasy your meal is the better. I am a big fan of eggs, cheeseburgers, bratwursts, pizza and mac and cheese.

A perennial favorite, bacon, is even better for those suffering. "The smell of sizzling bacon in a pan is enough to tempt even the staunchest of vegetarians," says Roberts. "There's something deeper going on inside. It's not just the idea of a tasty snack. There is some complex chemistry going on." This winning combination of fat and amino acids releases smells while cooking that reel in the eater.

Thus, it is crucial to your health that you eat a fatty meal after a night on the town. There is nothing more comforting that stuffing your face with a brat and mac and cheese. The warmth of the cheesy goodness and the juices of the sausage immediately increase metabolism. A very hearty meal stabilizes your body and makes you feel very cozy, and it leads your post-meal nap to be as revitalizing as possible.

So though fast food has also been proved to cure hangovers, stay away from soft drinks. Pop is full of sugar, and sugar will only worsen your headache. Those mixed drinks full of sweet and sugary concoctions almost guarantee a killer morning. I'm starting to have a headache just thinking about it.

As many people know, a little hair of the dog can help the most severe hangovers. A bloody mary is a good way to start feeling better; it never hurts to eat fruits and veggies. The tomato juice is full of important nutrients. However, adding more alcohol is the least effective method. It might just lead to another hangover.

The crippling pain of a hangover doesn't necessarily mean that your day is shot. Take it easy when you wake up and don't rush. Take the morning in, enjoy the comfort of your bed, and try to remember to never feel this terrible again. Drink lots of water and juice. Enjoy yourself and rehydrate. Next, access the situation. How are you feeling? Do you feel sick to your stomach? If not, it's time pillage the kitchen to make the tastiest and most filling meal ever. The greasier the better.

Remember to always drink responsibly.

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