Q: We enjoy socializing with another couple in our retirement community because they are so much fun, and they are always positive. They are "happiness oriented" and have that rare ability to spin their negative thoughts toward positive ones. Our problem is that we often find ourselves focusing on our negatives. We would like to learn how to be positive-oriented. Can you help us?

A: It is all about change of attitude and commitment! The trick is to learn how to laugh and not be sorry for yourselves. Teach yourselves not to take life too seriously. After all, some would say, we do not know where we came from, why we are here or where we are going.

Cheerful people soon learn happiness is contagious, self-fulfilling and tends to keep you better balanced, while enhancing your self-image. Time is all we own, so why not enjoy it, especially during the holidays?

Recently, I witnessed a man walking alone in a park and laughing loudly. I assumed he was on his cell phone. However, as I walked passed him I asked him why he was so happy. He said it was his habit of just talking to the trees and the birds that cheered him up and helped maintain his resiliency. I tried the nature walk, and it works!

Learning to accept and choose a simpler life also helps us to become more content. Don't judge others or try to change them. It is often unproductive. We do not enhance our own wellbeing if we attempt to diminish others by faulting them. Positively oriented people asses the situation, accept what they cannot control and then take action to move forward.

Success reflects itself when we receive a negative wake-up call and are forced to refocus our outlook and do it.

Discuss with your friends why you enjoy their company. Ask them to help you emulate their positive attitude. Others appreciate the opportunity to become mentors!

Q: We, like the rest of humanity, have awakened to our "new" world of conflict, bankruptcy, and the apathy of those who shape policy and control our destiny. Pessimism always accelerates pessimism. Who believes, if even possible, that our exuberance will return? Certainly, it won't happen in the short term. What are we to do?

A: Obviously, as new state-of-the-world issues unfold, we are forced to deal with them. As political, monetary and financial controls shift, lifestyles follows suit. The squeeze is on!

Few of us want to give up what we have, are frequently in denial about what is actually happening and fear making changes.

Less income, inflation poking itself upward, adult children returning to their parent's home or their parents needing to move to their children's home are situations many families now face.

When the experts pontificate and say the Great Depression can never happen again remind them that is what they said the last time!

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at [email protected]. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.