Three Time Loser wrote last week to say she was afraid of getting involved with the wrong man. Again.

When she was 22, she got pregnant "by a loser." When she was 25, she married "a good provider" who turned, two years later, into a "boring, nonsexual partner." So she had an affair with a married man.

"Surprise! Surprise! It took me two years and a broken heart to realize the married man was never going to leave his wife." She's now 30 and scared her boyfriend of a year will turn into Loser Number Four.

I suggested she draw four columns on a piece of paper, one for each of the four men, and list the red flags she ignored and their relationship-destroying traits.

Today we hear from Patrick, who says she didn't need four columns, she needed just one!

Patrick: Quite a victim she is. She made a bad decision and got pregnant when she was young, and it didn't work out. She then quickly found herself a man to provide for her and her child. In my part of the world, that looks like she married a meal ticket. She then dates a married man and leaves the meal ticket but ends up with a broken heart. Boo-hoo.

There's a universal rule of three: Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times, you're the problem. Each of these men was a numerator. She's the denominator. The bad decisions she made had nothing to do with those three men. They had everything to do with her.

You want her to make a list with four columns? It only needs one column: for her. The relationship she's in now will eventually end as poorly as the others, and then she'll again look outward for the cause.

Well, Patrick, I'd like to suggest a compromise. I think Three Time Loser needs to make five columns! One for each of the four men and one for herself. In the last column, she should list everything she did to sabotage the relationships, everything she knew but ignored, and everything she's learned so she doesn't make any of the same mistakes again.

Readers, no one much likes to talk about them, but booty calls exist, and at times in a person's life, they may serve a purpose. I'm not here to pass judgment. And I'll let one of my readers provide a Booty Call Do's and Don'ts ...

Yale: Both men and women can be someone's booty call, but it's generally women who have an issue with being on speed dial for 2:00 a.m. sex with someone that they've never seen when the sun was up.

Basically, someone is your booty call rather a person you're in a relationship with because you'd never be caught dead with them in public.

Even booty calls have their rules.

1. No sleeping over. Once the deed is done, get out.

2. No "dates." Ever. Booty call is for after your dates are over.

3. You don't "talk."

4. No sunlight shall fall upon the two of you together.

5. If you meet your booty call by accident, while you or they are with other people, you're complete strangers.

Do you make booty calls? Has anyone ever booty called you? Did it ever lead to more? Did you want more? Send it to [email protected]. And check out my blog www.talesfromthefront.com. To find out more about Cheryl Lavin, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.