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Susan Estrich
25 May 2012
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Big Steps and Baby Steps

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Just days after New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo signed into law legislation legalizing same-sex marriage, Rhode Island Gov. Lincoln Chafee and the coalition supporting similar legislation in that state effectively conceded defeat.

Unable to collect the necessary votes in the House, the openly gay Speaker, Gordon D. Fox, introduced legislation providing same-sex couples not the option of marriage but of "civil union" — a fiction designed to allow for basic legal protections while depriving gay couples the legitimacy that marriage brings. This week, the compromise legislation — opposed by gay-rights advocates as discriminatory — was passed by the state Senate, and the governor has signaled that he will likely sign it.

It wasn't so many years ago that even civil union was a controversial position among Democrats, much less many Republicans. So the action in Rhode Island can be seen, by Pollyannas anyway, as a step in the right direction. That was the view of the president of the Rhode Island state Senate, who told reporters, "We have moved one step in the right direction toward ensuring that individuals receive equal rights and protections under the law."

But it is a baby step, and whatever protection it provides to committed couples, it does so with the back of the hand.

If gays and lesbians are free in Rhode Island to create relationships with the rights and responsibilities of marriage, what possible basis is there for denying them the right to be "married" — to welcome their families to their "wedding" (who celebrates a union?), to hold themselves out as husbands and wives, to formal as well as substantive equality?

I have not heard a single explanation for such discrimination — and there is no other name for it — other than that "marriage" is for people of different sexes. Fine. Go marry someone of a different sex. But that is not a legal position, not an argument based on anything other than personal preference, taste or (not to denigrate it, but it has no place in the legislature) religious doctrine.

I would never tell a priest, minister or rabbi to preside over any ceremony that he or she believes conflicts with their religious values. But what right does the state have to tell those rabbis, priests and ministers, not to mention justices of the peace, that they may not, as a matter of law, unite same-sex couples in a marriage as opposed to a civil union?

This is not a question of principle, but one of the placement of political fig leaves to cover political cowardice. I can understand those who oppose any form of civil union; I disagree with them completely, but at least they are being honest in their views. But if civil union provides, for practical purposes, the protections that marriage does, what good reason is there to deny committed individuals dignity along with protection?

The Rhode Island law goes beyond denying dignity. The fine print makes clear that it also denies fundamental rights in the name of someone else's religious freedom. I have no problems with a priest refusing to perform a same-sex marriage. But I have a very big problem with the provision of the Rhode Island law that allows Catholic hospitals to deny to civil unioners (or whatever they are called) the rights afforded to husbands and wives when their loved ones are ill; or for Catholic universities to deny family leave to civil unioners who would otherwise be granted time off to care for an ill spouse. In Rhode Island, at least, the difference between civil union and marriage goes beyond formalities — for reasons that have no place in legislation.

A few years ago, same-sex couples in many states might have welcomed a law such as Rhode Island's. But the experience of other states with gay marriage and the rulings of courts from Massachusetts to California have made what was at best a half-full cup appear, as it always has been, unfairly half-empty. At a time when America is celebrating our freedom, there is no reason to deny freedom and equality to any of our fellow citizens because of their personal and private lives.

To find out more about Susan Estrich and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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Comments

19 Comments | Post Comment
Marriage was ordained by God as the union of one man with one woman. Period. end of story. Any other union is not and should never be considered marriage.
Comment: #1
Posted by: joseph wright
Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:44 PM
And the only union that should be recognized with ALL associated rights and responsibilities by a secular government is a civil union.
Comment: #2
Posted by: Doug Collins
Fri Jul 1, 2011 3:15 AM
According to your column in Friday July 1, you think Bachmann has no experience for the job as president!! Since when is that necessary? I thought being a community organizer was sufficient to be president . No one knows the current one from college days, no previous girlfriends, doesn't know how many states there are,. If any other of our presidents had doubled the national debt, which had taken more than two centuries to accumulate, in one year, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had then proposed to double the debt again within 10 years, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had criticized a state law that he admitted he never even read, would you think that he is just an ignorant hot head?
If any other of our presidents joined the country of Mexico and sued a state in the United States to force that state to continue to allow illegal
immigration, would you question his patriotism and wonder who's side he was on? If any other of our presidents had pronounced the Marine Corps like Marine Corpse, would you think him an idiot?
If any other of our presidents had put 87,000 workers out of work by arbitrarily placing a moratorium on offshore oil drilling on companies that have one of the best safety records of any industry because one foreign company had an accident, would you have agreed?
If any other of our presidents had used a forged document as the basis of the moratorium that would render 87000 American workers unemployed would you support him?
f any other of our presidents had been the first President to need a Teleprompter installed to be able to get through a press conference, would you have laughed and said this is more proof of how inept he is on his own and is really controlled by smarter men behind the scenes?
If any other of our presidents had spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to take his First Lady to a play in NYC, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had reduced your retirement plan holdings of GM stock by 90% and given the unions a majority stake in GM, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had made a joke at the expense of the Special Olympics, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had given Gordon Brown a set of inexpensive and incorrectly formatted DVDs, when Gordon Brown had given him a thoughtful and historically significant gift, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had given the Queen of England an iPod containing videos of his speeches, would you have thought it a proud moment for America ?
If any other of our presidents had bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents had visited Austria and made reference to the nonexistent "Austrian language," would you have brushed it off as a minor slip?
If any other of our presidents had filled his cabinet and circle of advisers with people who cannot seem to keep current in their income taxes, would you have approved?
If any other of our presidents would have flown all the way to Denmark to make a five minute speech about how the Olympics would benefit him walking out his front door in his home town, would you not have thought he was a self-important, conceited, egotistical jerk.
*If any other of our presidents had been so Spanish illiterate as to refer to "Cinco de Cuatro" in front of the Mexican ambassador when it was the 5th of May (Cinco de Mayo), and continued to flub it when he tried again, wouldn't you have winced in embarrassment?
If any other of our presidents had burned 9,000 gallons of jet fuel to go plant a single tree on Earth Day, would you have concluded he's a hypocrite?
If any other of our presidents' administrations had OK Air Force One flying low over millions of people followed by a jet fighter in downtown Manhattan causing widespread panic, would you have wondered whether they actually get what happened on 9-11?
If any other of our presidents had failed to send relief aid to flood victims throughout the Midwest with more people killed or made homeless than in New Orleans, would you want it made into a major ongoing political issue with claims of racism and incompetence?
If any other of our presidents had created the position of 32 Czars who report directly to him, bypassing the House and Senate on much of what is happening in America, would you have ever approved.
If any other of our presidents had ordered the firing of the CEO of a major corporation, even though he had no constitutional authority to do so, would you have approved? So, tell me again, what is it about Obama that makes him so brilliant and impressive?
And where is he this morning? Not in Washington taking of business for sure!
Comment: #3
Posted by: Sue
Fri Jul 1, 2011 6:04 AM
At least Bachmann knows the age od her 27 foster kids. Obama doesn't even know his daughters age. Yeah he is real brillant. I bet a million dollars his daughter knows we don't have 57 states and kids use an inhaler, not a breathalyzer.........It's real funny with 16%= unemployment that shovel ready is funny.

Susan...........screw you!
Comment: #4
Posted by: matt
Fri Jul 1, 2011 6:37 AM
By the way, where is the outrage about Syria...........isn't that an outrage according to Obama? Shouldn't the US be in there stopping it? Where's code pink?

That's what I love about you Libtards..........you can't even be honest with your own ideology!

Cut lying to yourself Susan.............
Comment: #5
Posted by: matt
Fri Jul 1, 2011 6:40 AM
Marriage is a Rite and not a right. First cousins cannot marry. People with certain medical problems cannot marry.
Polygamy is illegal. People cannot marry animals. Marriage is for life. Homosexual partners change partners very often. Civil unions I can tolerate, but marriage no. Again marriage is a Rite and not a right
Comment: #6
Posted by: ronald kohk
Fri Jul 1, 2011 2:28 PM
Mr Wrong says: "Marriage was ordained by God as the union of one man with one woman. Period. end of story. Any other union is not and should never be considered marriage." As usual, Mr. Wrong displays his knee-jerk ignorance. Anyone who has read the Bible knows that several of God's hand-picked leaders, as portrayed in the Old Testament, had MULTIPLE WIVES. So apparently the type of marriage ordained by God was ONE MAN, SEVERAL WOMEN???
Comment: #7
Posted by: cadbury
Fri Jul 1, 2011 2:58 PM
Re: cadbury Yes, some of God's hand-picked leaders failed. That did not make multiple wives right. The incessant cry-baby leftists are continuously using the four-year-old strategy, :Well, he did it , why can't I?" Grow up, already.
Comment: #8
Posted by: David Henricks
Fri Jul 1, 2011 3:33 PM
Re: cadbury That some sinned for their own selfish gratification does not translate to that sin being ordained or condoned. Cadbury, like all liberals you really are a cretin.
Comment: #9
Posted by: joseph wright
Fri Jul 1, 2011 5:26 PM
David Henricks says: "Yes, some of God's hand-picked leaders failed. That did not make multiple wives right." I totally agree that multiple wives is wrong in this day and age. But David, are you saying that your namesake King David, who had numerous wives including at least 8 named in the Bible, was a failed sinner? Really??? Dude, you want me to "grow up", but you seriously need to get educated before you talk.

And my favorite, Mr. Wrong...He says "That some sinned for their own selfish gratification does not translate to that sin being ordained or condoned." Again, you have constantly presented yourself as a god-fearing man. Do us all a favor and look up King David, direct ancestor of Jesus. Having shown your IGNORANCE of Bible history, you then go on to call about a quarter of the US population "cretins". Lovely, such a fine mind -- NOT!
Comment: #10
Posted by: cadbury
Sat Jul 2, 2011 1:20 PM
Re: cadbury Cadbury every post you make is more suggestive than the last one that perhaps God has chosen you in particular to demonstrate that liberals are indeed cretins, that liberalism is indeed an affliction of the mind, that the struggles of the left to rationalise its irrational positions is a task unending and a hellish burden to those on the left which requiring them to practice a sort of pop religion for tortured souls (liberalism) which souls in the words of Victor David Hanson "seek their own redemption through insideously bothering the lives of more happy others."
Comment: #11
Posted by: joseph wright
Sat Jul 2, 2011 2:34 PM
@Sue

Addressing your fabrications is like teaching a pig to sing - a waste of my time and will only annoy you. I would remind you that there's video footage of President George W. Bush holding hands with the King of Saudi Arabia.

@Joseph/Dan: I would remind you that Jesus never once discussed homosexuality in the 4 gospels. Not once. Talks about divorce. It may surpise you that "Don't be gay" did not make the Ten Commandments but "Don't commit adultry" did.
Comment: #12
Posted by: capiscan
Tue Jul 5, 2011 4:56 AM
Re: Sue Excellent comment. If possible I would like to like to post your comment on my blog with full credit to you as well as links to this thread or anywhere else you so desire. Please contact me in a comment on my website at kenwestisright.com.
Comment: #13
Posted by: kenwestisright.com
Tue Jul 5, 2011 1:42 PM
From Genesis to 1 Timothy, marriage in the Bible was between one man and all the women he could afford. For most men that was just one, but the option was there. Solomon has 700 wives and 300 concubines.

Marriage is the only official activity of a pastor, priest, or rabbi that is regulated by the state. I believe the state should step away from marriage. If two people want to join their lives together legally, let them go to the courthouse and get a license, then if a church wants to bless the union as a marriage, they can do so according to the dictates of the denomination.
Comment: #14
Posted by: Tom Blanton
Tue Jul 5, 2011 5:38 PM
Cadbury/Blanton
Cadbury the thrust (if there is one) of your post can best be summarized as “ to eat sh*t must be ordained by God because xmillion flies cannot be wrong.” The fact that x million flies eat sh*t does not make it right. Like all liberals you “know” much but what you think you know is invariably wrong. While you may be correct that David had at least 8 wives (there were others not named and additionally there were concubines) and it is fact that Solomon had many more wives and about 300 concubines and it is fact that polygamy was widely practiced in old testament times, you fail to understand that the bible confirms that it has always been God's view that marriage be a monogamous relationship as between one man and one woman. I am unaware of any verse in the old or new testaments wherein it is taught that God ordained that a man may have as many wives as he chooses to have. God's view never changes and creation is the physical expression of that view. “That is why a man will leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife [not wives] and the two of them become one body [not bodies]” Genesis 2.24 also 1 Timothy 3.2 -12 “ a bishop must be ….married only once” and Titus 1.6 say “the husband of one wife” when speaking of the necessities of spiritual leadership. Ephesians 5.22-33 when speaking of men and wives consistently refers to husband in the singular and wife in the singular. “for the husband is the head of the wife [not wives]….He who loves his wife [ not wives] loves himself. Mark 10, 3-9 “He [Jesus] said to them in reply What did Moses command you? They replied Moses permitted him to write a bill of divorce and dismiss her. But Jesus told them, Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife [not wives]and the two shall become one flesh [not fleshes]” This text describes God's view as unchanged from the beginning marriage is to be between one man and one woman even though man made views change.

Capsican
Gods views remain unchanging . Leviticus 18- 22 “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. Such thing is an abomination” and Leviticus 20 –13 “If a man lies with a male as with a woman both of them shall be put to death for their abominable deed. Romans 1, 26-27” Their females exchanged natural relations for unnatural and the males likewise gave up natural relations with females and burned with lust for on another. Males did shameful things with males and thus received in their own persons the due penalty for their perversion”.
Comment: #15
Posted by: joseph wright
Tue Jul 5, 2011 6:43 PM
We have massive problems in our country, and all the politicans can do is pass gay marriage laws!

Nuff Said...Dennis
Comment: #16
Posted by: Dennis
Tue Jul 5, 2011 9:31 PM
@Joe: Leviticus 11-9 Don't eat shrimp - are we condeming Red Lobster? Where is the outcry?
Leviticus 19-27 Do not cut the hair on the sides of your head or clip the edges of your beard. Do you have a beard? Are we going to outlaw haircuts and shaving?

And put down that ham and cheese sandwich!

Jesus did not mention homosexuality one time. Not once. He did talk a lot, a lot, a lot, about caring for the poor. And we continue to fail on that point. And that's where our shame is.
Comment: #17
Posted by: capiscan
Wed Jul 6, 2011 10:16 PM
Re: Doug Collins
It's not a civil union. It's a relationship!
What's the difference between two (or more) heterosexuals living together and two (or more) homosexuals living together?
Comment: #18
Posted by: Early
Fri Jul 8, 2011 6:56 AM
Instead of Civil Unions or Gay marraige can't we just give them 10% off of Vaseline for life and get them back in the closet?
Comment: #19
Posted by: Mike
Mon Jul 18, 2011 12:05 PM
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