When is the last time you watched a mindless movie that had no redeeming value on you intellectually, but it made you laugh a lot?

That perfectly describes the raging debate among voters and the rabid television and radio talk show hosts who love to yell and scream at the top of their lungs, "I'm an American, and by golly, you better show as much appreciation for this country as I do!"

But once you finish listening to these high-minded bloviators — and yes, that includes the voters who have bought into this nonsensical issue — ask yourself: Does it really have anything to do with anything?

I've watched this debate reach the level of absurdity this year because journalists and commentators have raised the question to Sen. Barack Obama, "Why don't you wear a flag lapel pin?"

I really got a kick out of that one during the ABC debate last month because not one person on stage — Sens. Hillary Clinton and Obama, along with moderators Charlie Gibson and George Stephanopoulos — bothered to accessorize his or her attire with a flag lapel pin.

Sen. John McCain has been traveling the globe as the Republican nominee, and this former soldier often doesn't wear a flag lapel pin.

It has become sort of like bird-watching, as I've surveyed elected officials on the local and national levels and looked them over like a henpecked mother or a foaming-at-the-mouth military drill sergeant, studying their attire and deeming them insufficiently American because of their lack of decency and respect by refusing to adorn themselves appropriately with lapel pins.

So after listening to radio callers and the folks who e-mail various TV shows, maybe we ought to expand this need to express our Americanism even further. Shouldn't we insist that our politicians all begin to sport red, white and blue socks so we can feel good knowing they are walking as Americans? How about asking male and female officeholders to sport the American colors as undergarments in an effort to show that their undying love for the country is so important to them that they want the flag pressed against their skin.

There have been times when the candidates — especially McCain, who has beaten back skin cancer — have worn hats on the campaign trail. I want to know, datgummit, why the man and woman running for the highest office in the land didn't cover their heads with flag baseball caps to express to the nation their love and affection for the U.S. of A?

Because it is clear that our nation has been paralyzed from being able to close our borders, feed the homeless, develop businesses in the inner cities, and save people from having their homes taken by foreclosure because of ruthless mortgage companies — all because some folks don't wear a flag lapel pin — we need to lead a national movement to demand that Congress and the states make a 28th Amendment to the U.S.

Constitution, requiring officeholders to wear flag lapel pins.

See, if it is so important, then take it all the way. Don't make it optional. Don't leave it up to someone to choose to wear a flag lapel pin. Let's really show those politicians that nothing is more important to us than seeing them with the U.S. flag on their chests.

That's what zealots do. They take something so simple, so personal, so voluntary and absolutely lose their minds trying to force someone else to do as they do, and everyone else be damned.

Folks, the first year I ever cast a ballot for political office was in 1988. And in the past 20 years, whether it was mayoral, school board, city council or a statewide, congressional or presidential campaign, the thought of what was on a politician's lapel never entered into the equation as to whether they were worthy of office.

Those who will criticize me will say, "Well, Roland, if it's no big deal, then why not wear one?" And the reply is the same: "If it's no big deal, then why do you make it a big deal?"

Let me tell you something. When I'm on the golf course and I slip my wedding ring into my golf bag, the Rev. Jacquie Hood Martin is still my wife. When we shoot hoops and I remove my Texas A&M University ring from my right hand, I still love my school. The fact that I no longer can wear my 1987 class ring from Houston's Jack Yates High School doesn't mean I don't cherish the crimson and gold. I may not be able to fit into the shirt in which I pledged, but I will be a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Inc. until the day I die.

I am an unapologetic Christian, but you won't see a cross dangling from my neck or a James Avery charm bracelet on my wrist. Why? Because my love of Jesus Christ is in my heart.

This debate is useless, tiresome and distracting. Why? Because if there are members of Congress who are wearing flag lapel pins but refuse to shore up our borders, aren't doing enough to stop the flow of drugs from coming into our neighborhoods, or eradicating the gaps between the haves and the have-nots, then are they truly fighting for the concerns of Americans or playing on the emotions of people by what's on their lapels?

We're better than that. We're smarter than that. It's time that we make decisions based on substance, which is what we say we actually care about. But maybe we're just lying to ourselves about that, too.

Roland S. Martin is an award-winning CNN contributor and the author of "Listening to the Spirit Within: 50 Perspectives on Faith." Please visit his Web site at www.RolandSMartin.com. To find out more about Roland S. Martin and read his past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.