More Crony Baloney

PARIS — You do not need to speak good French to understand the meaning of noblesse .

Just look at how swiftly Scooter Libby avoided prison time. Nothing lost in translation there.

Same for what the Germans call Schadenfreude . That's when someone takes pleasure in someone else's misfortune, such as the outing of a covert American spy just to watch her tattletale husband squirm.

It was Machiavellian how the neo-cons let the melodrama unfold in public, starting with letting Patrick Fitzgerald believe justice would prevail, followed by Valerie Plame's testimony, along with some congressional grousing. As though any of it would make a difference to our imperial co-presidency.

As they say in Mayberry, USA, " Au contraire , Aunt Bea."

Dubya thought it unfair that the veep's consigliore should do time pending appeal. So on behalf of Cheney Inc.'s fall guy, the Prodigal Compassionate Conservative Son returned.

But for Bush, Libby faced the Washington equivalent of hard time: 30 months. Unthinkable. At least Libby got charged and a fair hearing. It is the American way. Remember?

It's easy to forget that when you consider that the Bush-Cheney's global war on democracy (aka the global war on terror) has detained more people for far longer and without charges. All the Bill of Rights is to the Bushvolk is a mat on which to wipe blood and mud from their boots during their backward march through history.

The true radicals are not the people peacefully protesting the war on democracy; they are the people running the shadow government and roughshod over our Constitution.

Justice isn't swift under this post-9/11 government, but conclusions are quickly drawn. Almost anyone can be abducted by apparatchiks and flown to an undisclosed location to rendezvous with black-op interrogators working with the U.S. Department of We Do Not Exist and Neither Do You.

Dubya isn't even trying to pretend Libby's liberation is about national security.

However, he does pretend this is about liberte , not fraternite . Name a member of the Bush brotherhood who was punished for wrongdoing.

Bush hasn't gone soft on crime, either. Even God-fearing, born-again Christian murderesses got executed under Texas Gov. George W. Bush. Go to Hell and sin no more, he told them.

Nothing against the Euros, but Midwesterners also have some expressions. I'm adding "crony baloney" to the great American lexicon from which my favorites have become "what the?" and "Bushit."

Fitzgerald was an able prosecutor, so nothing against him. He got Bushwhacked by the best of them. All his talent, energy and our tax dollars just got flushed down the Tidy Basin Bowl.

At least there are still optimists in Washington. Vermont's Patrick Leahy is one. Good luck with that subpoena thing, Senator.

Despite Fitzgerald's efforts, it still burns that a journalist was the only person incarcerated in a saga that undermined U.S. espionage and possibly jeopardized other spies.

Say what you want about Judith Miller, but she took one for the team. The ex-New York Times reporter would be on her third poncho by now had not Libby identified himself as a source.

Notice that the women get jail time and the men get book tours. Keep an eye on Monica Goodling, formerly at Justice.

And who said chivalry is dead? No one this side of the Seine, that's for sure. Over here the old gents still tip their hats to the ladies. Here, scandalized politicians quit out of decency and honor.

How did Americans allow absolute power to rule this absolutely? Who gave permission for broadened extra-constitutional powers for the vice presidency? While Americans slept, a bloodless coup neutered our Legislature, activated the Judiciary with ominous portent and rendered harmless the citizenry.

Happy belated birthday, America!

Remember how Libby's prosecution began with him walking to court on crutches? Once his prison sentence was commuted, he practically levitated out of the building. A miracle? Non ! He is one of them. Hence, noblesse .

Rhonda Chriss Lokeman (lokeman@kcstar.com) is a columnist for the Kansas City Star. To find out more about Rhonda Chriss Lokeman, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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