HILLARY CLINTON-GLORIA STEINEM: Just to make the old boy network short-circuit. That plus Geraldine Ferraro as chief of staff.

CLINTON-MARTHA STEWART: Stewart built an empire — something handy as Clinton continues the Bush doctrine in Iraq on Day One. Hillary sees cookie baking as a housefrau chore; Martha sees it as a way to boost stock options. Never mind Martha's criminal past. Those charges were trumped up. Besides, the Clintons have a soft spot for ex-cons. (See Marc Rich.)

CLINTON-KATHLEEN SEBELIUS: The Kansas governor and Obamaphile is smart and gets things done without scorching the earth. She's likable and could draw more Midwestern voters. Clinton, unlike Sebelius, never managed a state budget. Clinton could learn a lot from her, including that one can pose for the "power issue" of a fashion magazine and still be taken seriously as a woman in politics. This year, Sebelius delivered the Democratic response to President Bush's last State of the Union address.

CLINTON-BILL CLINTON: This may be too many Clintons in the kitchen. At least being veep would keep the ex-president busy. This ticket can be summed up in two words: idle hands.

CLINTON-JOE BIDEN: The Delaware senator would make a great president. But the former presidential contender was like a VW bus stuck in traffic between Hillary's Hummer and Obama's Yukon hybrid. He's one of the smartest people in Congress and good on all issues that matter to Democrats. Voters might shun a solid East Coast ticket. (See Obama-Biden.)

CLINTON-SHEILA JACKSON LEE: A PushMe-PullYou ticket. Clinton voted for the war. Jackson Lee, a Clintonite, voted against it. She wouldn't bring much to the ticket, except she possibly would lure women of color away from Obama. Watch the "white flight" of Democrats to McCain.

CLINTON-JOHN EDWARDS: Ex-presidential candidate Edwards says Clinton or Obama would do well in the White House. He said she has the strength and experience and Obama is the uniter who will bring great change.

Would this "proud son of a mill worker" cross the picket line and join Clinton's union-busting pals who confuse "The Grapes of Wrath" with something bottled in Napa? Let's hope not.

CLINTON-BARACK OBAMA: When pigs fly. (See Nancy Pelosi.)

CLINTON-ED RENDELL: Al Gore had no luck with a similar tactic. Joe Lieberman was slated to become the nation's first Jewish vice president, but after Bush II came in, the Connecticut senator quit the party, registered Independent and votes Republican. He now stumps for GOP nominee John McCain. Pennsylvania Gov. Rendell says whites won't vote a black man into the White House. Having his name on the ticket will help determine whether white men would be willing to put a Keystone Jew there.

CLINTON-MICHAEL BLOOMBERG: Bloomberg knows what's best for the economy. The Independent is also a wealthy media mogul. The Clintons never have turned down friends with money, especially friends with money who control media. New York, New York? No way.

CLINTON-EMANUEL CLEAVER: The Kansas City, Mo., congressman and that city's first African-American mayor has a reputation for strong economic development. The Methodist minister also could cancel the Obamaphile pastor's diatribes from a bully pulpit. This might be more church-and-state intimacy than most voters want, however.

CLINTON-BILL RICHARDSON: The New Mexico governor shared Super Bowl nibbles with Bill Clinton and then endorsed Barack Obama. Always one to take the high road, he still speaks highly of Hillary Clinton.

The experienced Richardson got lost in the media glare over Clinton and Obama. Though he never exploited his Hispanic roots, his place on the ticket could have Latino Republicans crossing over to help someone who looks like them be first in line for the presidency.

CLINTON-PENN & TELLER: As the title of their popular Showtime show suggests, these guys know it when they see it. There's been no shortage of it on the Clinton campaign trail; that's for sure. Voters might appreciate having someone in the White House who will expose the smoke, mirrors and other tricks of the trade.

Rhonda Chriss Lokeman (lokeman@kcstar.com) is a columnist for The Kansas City Star. To find out more about Rhonda Chriss Lokeman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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