KANSAS CITY, Mo. — If you're going to have one of the biggest cattle calls in North America, it may as well be in one of Missouri's famous stockyards. What better location for tryouts for "American Idol" than a part of town accustomed to judging steers and heifers?

This part of Kansas City used to be where livestock was herded, tagged and inspected. For three days, Team Idol did almost the same thing with people from as far away as South Dakota and Virginia. They were rounded up, tagged, sectioned off and paraded before judges to see whether they were good enough to go to market.

In "Idol's" case, the market is a national television audience.

The Fox network reality program has become pop legend. The people who audition in the eight cities chosen for this latest season hope to become household names, like previous "Idol" winners, named Ruben, Fantasia, Taylor, Carrie and Kelly. Naturally, Kansas Citians want to take after their hometown "Idol," singer David Cook.

Most viewers are familiar with what happens on the small screen once moderator Ryan Seacrest introduces contestants, who then appear before co-hosts Randy, Simon and Paula to be praised or humiliated. That's reality TV but with some scripting for the celebrity judges.

But surreality TV is what happens leading up to that moment. The show actually begins long before it appears on TV. Behind the scenes is where the fun starts.

This is where people lined up in cities such as Kansas City wait for hours, starting before sunrise. After being confined for so long, some people just spontaneously burst into song. Solo eruptions occur without warning.

This is a crowd in which Rihanna, Whitney, Aretha and the two Elvises (Presley and Costello) are no strangers. These people know Nelly, Shakira, Cat Stevens and Josh Groban like the backs of their hands, and trust me, they will let you know it.

In these lines, drummers drum, guitarists strum and singers sing. It's here that contestants get their first shot of the competition. It's also where Team Idol plucks its prey.

Team Idol loves misfits, people who don't fit in with the crowd. The oddballs haven't come to win "Idol"; they've come just to be on "Idol."

Such people weren't difficult for Team Idol to spot. Most came dressed in costume, even if deep inside they expected to be taken seriously.

Hard to miss the young man in the zebra print with a shirt made of phony dollar bills. Team Idol sure didn't. "Money Man," folks around him started calling him. When Team Idol swooped in with a camera crew in a golf cart, bystanders yelled, "Show 'em the money, Money Man."

Once inside the arena for his first audition, before two unknown judges, Money Man passed muster. He got a golden ticket, thereby allowing him to go to the next round. He didn't have to sing well at all.

Sunshine also made it. Sunshine, not her real name, said she is from corn country. She was best known to the crowd as the barefoot hippie guitarist who channeled Joan Baez.

Team Idol swooped down on Sunshine like a hawk on a mouse. The camera panned her naked feet while she talked about her life on the road and the songs she was writing.

When an "Idol" interviewer asked about David Cook, she claimed never to have heard of him. "I've just come from the woods," she said. Team Idol kept filming and later passed her a card telling her where on "Idol's" Web site she could be found. "Cool," she said.

Sunshine also passed her first audition, even though many other singers who were better were shown the exit.

The two cheerleaders also made it to Round Two. The young women dressed in red and white shook pompoms and made lots of noise, none of which could be confused with singing. Same goes for the cute chicks in skinny jeans and high heels, who smiled a lot and tossed back their hair.

It soon became clear that this show is one part talent and two parts showmanship. Either you got it or you don't. "American Idol" is "Survivor" Hollywood-style. It's not fair; it's based on dumb luck; and you never know who will be voted off the island.

Rhonda Chriss Lokeman (RCLCreators@kc.rr.com) is a contributing editor to The Kansas City Star. To find out more about Rhonda Chriss Lokeman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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