Molly Ivins March 3

WASHINGTON — Don't you feel sorry for people who aren't interested in politics? They're missing the greatest show on Earth! What a gong show in South Carolina. Love that format. Making those guys look at their own negative ads and respond to them — genius.

Granted, the results were not happy, but then, neither were the ads. Meantime, brace yourself for a considerable shock: Rupert Murdoch, the Darth Vader of journalism, has done something phenomenally decent.

Murdoch is the Frank Munsey of our day. Munsey, an early newspaper baron, is now remembered only because of William Allen White's obituary on him: "He had the talent of a meatpacker, the morals of a money-changer and the manners of an undertaker."

Murdoch, who owns the Fox network among many other properties, seemed fated for the same sort of farewell. But recently, he and Ted Turner of CNN have gotten into this semi-elevated snorting match about the public good and whatnot. Lo and behold, Murdoch popped up the other day and offered hours of free television time for straight candidate statements to the people. Not only on election eve, when people will actually watch, but roadblocked hours and half-hours, which means that all the networks agree to same (Murdoch stipulated that said time not conflict with any network's live sporting events; the man is in business, after all, and Fox has NFL football). Plus, he's offering free time for one-minute position statements on 10 important issues for three or four weeks before the election. Hallelujah!

And there's more. For a minute there, I thought I had written Murdoch's speech to the National Press Club myself. Listen to this: "The average candidate for the United States Senate today spends millions on television spots. Deplorably, as a result, raising those funds has become not just a top priority of our political leaders but something of an obsession. It is a cancer on our system which we must tackle ...

"As you people see and know more than anyone, money corrupts the political system in America from top to bottom. It corrodes our democracy. It turns both the people and their leaders cynical.

"Well-intentioned campaign finance and fairness laws simply haven't helped and have probably hurt.

What we need is nothing less than a wholesale change in our system. It would be no solution to mandate free TV advertising time, if the corrupting money was simply diverted to other uses. We need a public and private sector study group to guide us toward a model that I believe would be more nearly like the British system — short campaigns, free television time and little money in the system."

Rupert Murdoch, my hero! If this works, I promise to write him the most beautiful obit anyone ever got.

Speaking of people addressing real issues, behold the Establishment reaction to the nooz that people are upset about the economy. (The wonderful thing about using the word Establishment is that no one really knows who we mean, but we all have an idea.) Pundit George Will thinks the culprit is boredom — people are voting for Pat Buchanan out of ennui with an otherwise perfect world. Economist Paul Samuelson says we're all whiners and just don't understand how well-off we are. The New York Times' William Safire says that a suggested cure for our non-existent ills is corporate socialism. (Gee, I haven't been accused of being a socialist in quite some time — nice to see it making a comeback.)

Here's the deal. In the last seven years, 3 million Americans have lost their jobs because of layoffs. The new economy is creating more jobs, but as Rep. Peter DeFazio of Oregon notes, they're "McJobs" — low pay, no benefits. One in five American jobs is part-time. The largest employer in America is Manpower Inc., the king of temps. The number of Americans holding more than one job has doubled in the last 15 years.

I'm considering new ways of defining the income gap. For example, the television pundit who said, "Take an average, middle-class American family with an income of $80,000 ... " When was the last time he ate a salad that had iceberg lettuce in it? People who eat only romaine and radicchio shouldn't be allowed to speak for the rest of us.

The median income in this country is $33,000 a year for a family of four. Half of such families live on less than that. We are not suffering from boredom, whininess or socialist inclinations. To quote DeFazio again, the question is whether we value people enough to make sure that those who work for a living make a living.

***

Molly Ivins is a columnist for the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. You can write to Molly Ivins at Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., #700, Los Angeles, Calif. 90045.

COPYRIGHT 1996 CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.