Molly Ivins December 22

AUSTIN, Texas — We live in a great nation — among the Christmas catalogs is one especially for dog owners, full of dandy things you can get for Bowser and Fido. I was perusing the item about the "Gourmet Bone Basket" — "He'll jump for joy when he sees this handwoven, bone-shaped basket brimming with over two pounds of the most popular dog treats" — when what to my wondering eyes should appear but the item immediately underneath the Christmas gift basket for your dog. "Hanukkah Bowl With Treats," in case your dog is Jewish.

"Say Mazel Tov to the dog in your life! Elegant, silver-plated 8-inch bowl is filled with hand-decorated, all natural peanut butter treats: six Star of David cookies and a Menorah bone, plus a furry ball squeak toy." Now that I think of it, the poodle has shown distinct symptoms of being Jewish for years: She's incredibly smart, has a mordant sense of humor and loves bagels.

And for those of you who still haven't gotten anything for your human loved ones, here's the annual Christmas Procrastinators' Book List. Happily, many bookstores have taken to staying open late, so we can procrastinate even longer.

— "The Poisonwood Bible" by Barbara Kingsolver — the best book I read all year. The story of an American missionary family in the Congo at the time of independence (1960) and afterward. Told by the four daughters of the family, each a voice so distinct one does not need the name of the character to know who is speaking. Although I think this superb book should be read by everyone, I would particularly recommend it for the female persons on your list.

— A wonderful companion piece to "The Poisonwood Bible" — and a superb piece of history on its own — is Adam Hockschild's "King Leopold's Ghost," the extraordinary story of the twisted Belgian king who made the entire Congo his private plantation with a system of forced labor that killed literally millions of people. This story is almost unknown here, and in addition to its bizarre villain, it also features real heroes: missionaries, journalists and diplomats who worked for years to end the horror.

— "An Empire Wilderness" by Robert Kaplan. If you were to look at the United States as though it were a foreign country, this is what you might come up with. Kaplan notices the things we take for granted: gated communities, failing cities, new forms of suburbs.

— "Cold New World: Growing Up in a Harder Country" by William Finnegan. All the pompous old windbags who judge young people by saying, "When I was a boy ..." need to read this book.

Being young today is not what it was when we were young — read and learn.

— "Pillar of Fire: America in the King Years" by Taylor Branch. If you missed this when it came out, go back and get it now. Not just a biography of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. but a splendid example of social history at its best — and besides, it's fun to read about a time when giants walked among us.

— Speaking of giants, I think Robert Dallek's "Flawed Giant: Lyndon Johnson and His Times" is the best LBJ bio yet. If you still haven't forgiven him for Vietnam, fine, skip this — but if you're ready to give him credit where he earned it, this book is excellent for those ready to reconsider LBJ.

— "Scorpion Tongues: Gossip, Celebrity and American Politics" by Gail Collins. Talk about timely — and this book truly provides the consolation of history — we have been through times just as ghastly as these and survived.

— "Be Sweet: A Conditional Love Story" by Roy Blount Jr. Blount is one of the funnier Americans living, but this book can make you cry, too. Perfect for mothers and their children.

— "Family Man" by Calvin Trillin, a man even funnier than Roy Blount. Here is Trillin on the oddities of families — don't give it to anyone who has never been in one.

— "Oscar Wilde's Last Stand" by Philip Hoare. I really enjoyed this tale of an outrageous, almost-forgotten trial in Britain in which the entire Establishment was accused of decadence. A timely reminder that our moralists are always with us — and always ready to exploit for political advantage.

— "The Lustre of Our Country" by John T. Noonan Jr., a fine study of religious freedom in America. A wonderful Christmas present for friends in the Christian Coalition and civil libertarians as well. It's that well done — everyone can learn from it.

— "Tender at the Bone: Growing Up at the Table" by Ruth Reichl. Another funny book, this one mostly about food — it's recommended for anyone you know who eats.

— This may not sound like the perfect Christmas book, but "We Wish to Inform You That Tomorrow We Will Be Killed With Our Families" by Philip Gourevitch may in fact be what we should think about during holidays celebrating peace on Earth. These stunning reports about the genocide in Rwanda are actually about the humanity of those involved, which is, in a way, more shocking than anything else.

— A two-fer for those who love politics and mysteries: "Mackerel by Moonlight" by William F. Weld. Weld's political career was ended by Sen. Jesse Helms; we may all live to thank Helms for that yet.

Molly Ivins is a columnist for the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. To find out more about Molly Ivins and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.

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