Turkeys of the Year Awards

Another Thanksgiving has come and gone, and despite the turmoil in Washington, we still have much to be thankful for. In addition to all the ways I have been blessed, I am thankful for my readers, even the liberals. With that being said, what better time to present the Dear Mark Turkeys of the Year Awards.

Sen. Mary Landrieu, Democrat Louisiana: Landrieu garners this honor by unabashedly representing everything that is wrong with politics today.

During the health care reform negotiations, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid gave the state of Louisiana $300 million in additional Medicaid funding to secure Landrieu's vote to bring the legislation to the floor for debate.

Landrieu's move is like Aunt Ethel's Thanksgiving Jell-O mold — it's pretty shaky, and you can see right through it. Where I come from, we call that bribery — and in Louisiana bribery just cost former House member William Jefferson 13 years in prison. Because this is a family column, I won't elaborate on the other profession Ms. Landrieu represents by exchanging her vote for money.

Jobs Created and Saved: This is the ambiguously adorable term that the Obama administration has used to measure the success of the stimulus package. It may not be a turkey as much as it is a fruitcake. No one really knows what is in a fruitcake or where one comes from, and no one has ever claimed to have actually bought one. Few people know that the administration actually test marketed a few more slogans: Jobs sliced and diced, jobs shaked and baked, jobs tossed and turned, and finally, jobs shucked and jived.

The Stimulus Package: This legislation was sold as an emergency job creator, and although unemployment has flown past 10 percent, the Democrats continue to claim it's working.

Only a fifth of the money has been spent or allocated, and now some Democrats are talking about another stimulus package. Even on Thanksgiving you can't quench the liberals' appetite for tax dollars.

ACORN: The organization that gobbled up millions of our tax dollars and where Barack Obama cut his community organizing teeth was brought down by, of all things, a cartoonish pimp and prostitute. The Turkey Award is presented for the fact that ACORN election shenanigans gave us Sen. Al Franken in Minnesota, which in turn could give us government-run health care.

President Obama's Teleprompter: This electronic media gizmo has made our president say all kind of crazy things this year, like apologizing around the world for the greatness of America. With the teleprompter's help, Obama told us the recession is over and the economy is in better shape. It even gave the impression that Obama said Democrat health care reform would lower premiums, improve access, reduce the deficit and not cover illegal immigrants. Rahm Emanuel better keep that teleprompter in check, or the president's approval ratings may start to decline. Oh, too late.

The House of Representatives: This bunch is the Grand Poobah of the Turkeys of the Year. By passing its versions of cap-and-trade, the stimulus package and health care reform, the House of Representatives has given Americans the bird, overstuffed with trillions of our tax dollars, while serving it with heaping sides of bologna.

Nancy Pelosi: Well isn't it obvious why the speaker of the House would receive a Turkey of the Year award? Pelosi is the uninvited guest who eats all of your food, drinks all of your beer and annoys the heck out of everyone by telling them what's good for them. And when Thanksgiving is over, you're left hungry and your head hurts.

Dear Mark is a public platform for your enrichment and entertainment. E-mail your questions to marklevy92@aol.com. To find out more about Mark Levy, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.

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