Negligence on the Negligee Front

Everyone in underwear was there.

Everyone in the underwear biz, that is, was there in a fancy New York ballroom a few days back. It was, after all, the night the intimate apparel industry saluted its best and brightest, a fete on par with the Emmys — the glittering, glamorous 32nd annual Femmys!

OK, so maybe it wasn't quite on par with the Emmys. Believe me, even the Emmys wouldn't be the Emmys without these wizards of lift, separate, then lift some more. And yet, the public praise they get?

Scanty.

This is a gross oversight on our part. After all, these are the folks who toil each day to improve the undergarment as we know it. Their work has an impact on pretty much every one of us, pretty much every day. Spend tomorrow in some outstretched undies and you'll have to agree. (You'll also have to walk funny. Wish I could be there!)

"We're changing a lot," said Berna Goldstein, vice president of merchandise at Vanity Fair Brands, mingling among her fellow undergarmentos. "Right now technology is driving the bra business, making things lighter, breathable, comfortable."

Indeed, one of the evening's honorees, the president of Elastic Fabrics of America himself, Jim Robbins, said his company is working on new fabric that will stretch even further and snap back even tighter. That's the holy grail of what's known as "shapewear" (and used to be known as "foundation garments," a word now as off-limits as the "G" word: girdle).

Another innovation Robbins is embracing is fabric-based underwear moisture control. But … maybe let's not get into that. Also up-and-coming, he said, is anti-microbial underwear.

But … let's not get into that either. Let's get back to the gala.

It was sponsored by the industry's Underfashion Club, which invited some top lingerie students to show off their work — on mannequins, of course. One of the students, Candice Guttman, remembered the very day she knew her future contained corsets: "I saw 'Cabaret' when I was 7."

"I just really like dealing with silk and velvet and lace," said another student, Jennifer Ostroski. "My mom always tells me to design for her." (Mrs. Ostroski, stop reading NOW.) "She says, 'Lift my boobs up!' But that's not what I'm going for. I'm going for elegant and breathtaking." (Mrs. O., resume your reading and don't feel bad. Your daughter is very talented!)

In fact, all of the students' work was heartbreakingly gorgeous. (Note to self: Ditch the Hanes for Her already!) With any luck, these up-and-comers will have a career as long and fulfilling as Roslyn Harte's.

"Sixty years," said Harte. That's how long she's been a designer. She started out in nighties then switched to bras — a lucky move, she said, because nightgowns are in freefall. Everyone's sleeping in sweatpants.

So are bras in freefall now, too?

"Hell no!" said the 82-year-old. "Bras are more important than ever because cleavage is more important than ever. I get on the subway and I'm amazed and a little appalled at the morning cleavage."

Then she toddles into work to help America show it off some more.

God bless the overlooked undergarment workers. Each and every one of them deserves a Femmy. (Except, perhaps, whoever let Mrs. Ostroski down.)

Lenore Skenazy is a contributing editor at the New York Sun. To find out more about Lenore Skenazy (lenore@lenoretown.com), and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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