Hey, Kwame, Take a Look at My Mailbag

Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, fearing an upcoming indictment on charges of perjury and obstruction of justice, launched into a tirade during a speech about the state of the city.

Kilpatrick, a married man, allegedly had an affair with his married chief of staff. The city fired a police officer and the deputy police chief involved in investigating wrongdoing by the mayor's security team. During the wrongful termination trial, the mayor and his chief of staff, under oath, denied having a romantic or intimate affair.

Unfortunately for the pair, a local newspaper obtained some 14,000 text messages to and from the mayor and the aide, in which they discuss, in graphic details, their affair. The mayor, resorting to the time-honored tradition of blaming everything and everybody but global warming and the Loch Ness monster, said, "In the past 30 days, I've been called a nigger more than any time in my entire life." He then talked about receiving death threats, and blamed the media for its unfair focus on his activities and for the scrutiny's impact on his family. "In the past three days, I've received more death threats than I have in my entire administration. … I don't believe that a Nielsen rating is worth the life of my children or your children."

Please, pass the Kleenex. A victim of white racism? Perhaps the good mayor might want to take a look at my mailbag.

The following is a sampling of e-mail — grammatical errors and all — I recently received while promoting my new book, "Stupid Black Men: How to Play the Race Card — and Lose." The book makes the point, among other things, that white racism no longer poses a significant hurdle to black progress and achievement. Apparently, many blacks disagree:

"f—- you and you book n—-er"

"eat s—- an die n—-er"

"Your STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"MR. ELDERS, YOUR BOOK "STUPID BLACK MEN" I WOULD THINK THAT A PERSON WITH YOUR EDUCATION COULD COME UP WITH A BETTER TITLE THAN THAT. … YOU DON'T SEEM TO LIKE BLACK PEOPLE TO MUCH!!!!!!!!!"

"you are paid to critize the marginal citizens … further your paternal allegience to the president even thought he has made collosul mistakes"

"Mr N—-er how much white a— can you kiss at one time.

You think cause white people let you make a little money you have arrived. Let me tell you one thing if your a— kisssing self step out of line for one min. you are through. You see n—-ers like you where the Africans catching other Africans, it is in your DNA. You are that one n—-er that abused your brother in slavery. The things some n—-ers will do for money."

"You are no better than Foxnews. You are black folks worst nightmare. It is not white folk who slay us it is uncle Toms like you."

"Why do you hate Obama so much? Is it because you had to whore yourself or forget where you came from and who you are (a black man in a country run by rich white people) to get where you are (or want to be), and he did not? … You're simply a HATER/IDIOT/N—-ER!!! … Or, maybe your rhetoric is the only way your Uncle Tom a— can make money — trashing successful black people who cannot/refuse to whore themselves for white America like you do."

"STUPID BLACK MEN VS. A SMART A— D—- SUCKING N—-ER."

"You are a f—-ing Uncle Tom Bitch."

"Please the next time you take a s—- remember to 'smell it.' Then you might understand what is at stake here as Mr. Obama and the rest of us move America forward, there is no room for you in the universe ahead."

"You are an absolute disgrace to your race — a pathetic self-serving idiot. I usually applaud people of accomplishment but your book and your show is a sell-out. When I see you I think of all the 'n—-ers' that participated in the slave trade. … I think that it is 'n—-ers' like you that have held black America back."

"ITS APPARENT THAT YOU ARE A PUPPET, A INDIVIDUAL THAT I WOULD GUESS IS MARRIED TO A WHITE WOMEN, HAD VERY FEW FRIENDS GROWING UP, AND A GOOD PART OF THOSE CHASED YOU HOME AND SOME HOW YOU START ACCEPTING THE ROLE OF UNCLE TOM YEARS AGO. … YOU ARE A JOKE, YOU REALLY HAVE NO PLACE IN OUR SOCIETY, YOU SHOULD BE REMOVED FOR GOOD."

In fairness, I received at least one note without expletives, and with proper spelling and grammar:

"You are so filthy and disgusting that being dead would be punishment for the dead! Why don't you hang yourself from a burning cross!"

So, Mayor Kilpatrick, I feel your pain. But so far, at least in my case, no indictment appears forthcoming.

Larry Elder is a syndicated radio talk show host and best-selling author. His latest book, "Stupid Black Men: How to Play the Race Card — and Lose," is available now. To find out more about Larry Elder, visit his Web page at www.LarryElder.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

CREATORS SYNDICATE COPYRIGHT 2008 LAURENCE A. ELDER