As soon as the priest heard about proposed plans for a domestic partner registry in Cleveland, he called City Councilman Joe Cimperman.

"You are disloyal to your faith," the priest told Cimperman, who is a lifelong Catholic and chief sponsor of the registry. "This is the wrong thing to do."

My immediate response would have been to ask the priest a few questions:

Does he really think discouraging any version of committed love between two adults should be a priority in these desperate times of lost jobs and foreclosed homes?

Has he noticed that northeastern Ohio is a region in economic crisis?

Wouldn't his time be better spent helping to slow the exodus of yet more members of his depleting flock and stemming the fear of those who remain?

Cimperman's response was more measured. He didn't agree with the priest, and he gently made it clear just why.

"I was raised by a mom who believed that our faith was always more about human rights than religious conscription," Cimperman told him. "So this is completely consistent with my Catholic faith."

It's also the decent thing to do in a city that has failed time and again to honor the significant contributions of an entire population of citizens who long to make legal commitments to those they love.

Ohio tried to vote homosexual love out of existence in 2004 by passing Issue 1, which outlawed gay marriage and broke many hearts. Even after that, many gays and lesbians chose to stay. This registry is an act of gratitude, however meager, to let them know that a lot of us are glad they did.

Contrary to some conservatives' claims, gays and lesbians have no interest in undermining heterosexual marriage — mine or anyone else's. All they want is the same chance at committed love that we heterosexuals get every day, regardless of whether we deserve it or how many times we've screwed it up in the past.

In America, if you love someone with different plumbing from yours, you get to try again. And again. And again.

If you're gay or lesbian, in most states, you can't marry even once, nor can you form a civil union, no matter how much you love the other person.

This domestic registry, which has yet to be passed by City Council, would be a first step to change that.

"We've been promising the (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) community something for years," Cimperman said. "Domestic registry is always seen as a precursor to partner benefits."

Granted, this falls far short of what the gay community deserves. The registry would be nonbinding, which means no employer would be forced to extend benefits to unwed couples and no hospital would have to allow visits with a partner.

And couples would have to fork over a fee to be registered, which, in these tight financial times, sure doesn't sound like much of a bargain. Pay 75 bucks, and hope someone will care.

It's a start, Cimperman insists. And not just for gay and lesbian couples.

"Ohio got rid of common-law marriage in the early '90s," Cimperman said. "This protects people who don't want to get married but are in a committed relationship."

That would include the many elderly couples who love each other and live together but don't want to marry because of potential financial penalties. They worry about the marriage tax and losing pension or military benefits. Many seniors also fear getting socked with their partners' medical bills from catastrophic illnesses.

"This would give them some protection," Cimperman said. "At least hospitals could look up their names and see that they are a couple." In the most desperate of moments, that could mean the difference between dying alone and dying with your loved one at your side.

When Cimperman explained all this to the priest, the priest backed down.

"It kind of took the wind out of his sails," Cimperman said.

Slowly, the tide begins to rise.

Connie Schultz is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for The Plain Dealer in Cleveland and the author of two books from Random House: "Life Happens" and "... and His Lovely Wife." To find out more about Connie Schultz (cschultz@plaind.com) and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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