Talk about an excruciating experience. The media research company Experian Simmons spent an entire year surveying diehard Republicans and Democrats regarding what they watch on TV, and the results are now in. The top non-auction Republican shows are: "This Old House" on PBS, "The 700 Club" on CBN, "Swamp Loggers" on the Discovery Channel, "Top Shot" on the History Channel and "The Bachelor" on ABC.
Democrats favored these: Comedy Central's "The Daily Show" and "The Colbert Report," "Masterpiece" on PBS, "30 Rock" and "Parks and Recreation" on NBC, and "The View" on ABC.
So let's break it down. Apparently, conservatives enjoy fixing stuff and building things. "This Old House" is basically a repair program without Tim Allen. "Swamp Loggers" takes the viewer into the woods of North Carolina where trees are cut down and hauled away on camera. Please stop reading if the excitement is getting to be too much.
"The 700 Club" features spiritual guidance, "Top Shot" is about shooting guns and stuff, and "The Bachelor" is looking for love in all the wrong places (network TV). If we were to bring in an FBI profiler, the person who watches all these shows would likely pray before going on a date with an armed lumberjack.
On the liberal side, the analysis is easier. Jon Stewart and Stevie Colbert are experts in bear-baiting conservatives and have developed faux news programs to mock people like Mitt Romney. Stoned college kids are a big part of their audience.
"Masterpiece" is very highbrow, as the people in Cambridge, Mass., apparently can't get enough of the angst among the British aristocracy.
"30 Rock" stars Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin, and just thinking about them makes liberals warm all over. Same with "The View." When Whoopi and Joy let loose, there is true joy in San Francisco.
It is obvious that liberal Americans enjoy personalities that see the world the way they do. Conservatives, on the other hand, want action. Shooting, tree cutting, praying: all action verbs. In fact, the only two personalities on the extended Republican show list are Larry the Cable Guy and Jay Leno, who is most likely mortified. The No. 12 show for right-wingers is "Swamp People" on the History Channel. Here we go again with the damp woods.
What is it about backwaters that Republicans like? I simply don't know. "Swamp People" are citizens who ride around in airboats fishing and dodging water moccasins. Talk about must-see TV.
On the extended liberal list we find "Cougar Town" on ABC. This is a Courteney Cox vehicle whereby aging ladies socialize with younger guys. If those men would only live in the swamps, perhaps we could finally have detente between the right and the left in this country.
In the end, the television choices that both liberals and conservatives are making really tell us just one relevant thing: They all have too much time on their hands.
Veteran TV news anchor Bill O'Reilly is host of the Fox News show "The O'Reilly Factor" and author of the book "Pinheads and Patriots: Where You Stand in the Age of Obama." To find out more about Bill O'Reilly, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com. This column originates on the website www.billoreilly.com.
COPYRIGHT 2011 BillOReilly.com
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM
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8 Comments | Post Comment
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Right. And it would be a better use of time to listen to you? Maybe you're a bit miffed we don't choose to tune in to the crap you have to sell?
Comment: #1
Posted by: Masako
Fri Dec 16, 2011 9:24 PM
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Hey, Masako, you found time to tune in and read O'Reilly. You must be addicted. Or maybe you're just a misguided liberal attack dog who gets off on criticizing people, perticularly conservatives. Try getting a life besides being a useless drag on society and occupier, jerk.
Comment: #2
Posted by: Derel Schrock
Sat Dec 17, 2011 7:14 AM
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Dear Shrock. I criticize liberals and conservatives equally, when I think they are full of it. Speaking of attack dogs, what do you think O'Reilly and your are? I merely returned fire.
Comment: #3
Posted by: Masako
Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:10 PM
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I think many overreact to anything this guy writes or says. His appearance is sort of stern, perhaps reminding some of a father thay still haven't come to terms with, but his style belies that look. He is being especially puckish here, a quality found in many of his articles. Conservatives take a beating from the likes of Jon Stewart, O'Reilly just musses up the hair of liberals. I guess there is a soft insult there, but no reason to overreact with rage and vulgarities. Too much time, as he says.
Comment: #4
Posted by: Tom
Tue Dec 20, 2011 5:43 AM
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Dear Tom. Sometimes I actually like this guy, like when he wrote his "Memo to the Occupiers." He can be funny and very perceptive, but he can also be self-righteous and hypocritical. Since he makes so much money in his media adventures, it seems sad he can't be happy just selling his wit instead of reverting to the "us verus them" tone. There is so much of that.
And then there is the over use of labels, which should be beneath him. I don't know what a "liberal" is any more. Once upon a time it meant a free-thinking, kind spirit. Now it seems to mean someone who thinks government is the solution to everything. Or maybe it means someone with horns and a hotline to the devil? Maybe the last two are the same thing. And an awful lot of people hide behind the label "conservative" who are anything but.
Comment: #5
Posted by: Masako
Tue Dec 20, 2011 6:08 PM
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Masako,
You are right, you often are, when you say there is too much of "us versus them", but that is not going away soon. Conservatives, and by this I mean citizens and not politicians, have seen where this progressive stuff is leading and we truly believe it is the wrong path for our country. From the left I quote Bill Maher: "...(w)hen you elect a Tea Bagger to Congress. Knowledge-challenged, brain dead people elected their like to Congress, and that is how we got into a an argument over whether we should pay our bills." The left is embodied by this hateful and completely inane statement. Responsible people pay their bills, that is all. We tighten our belts when times are tough, we don't wail about injustice because we live in a real world, not some fantastical imaginary planet where money grows from hair follicles. Do not ask a conservative to compromise with Maher's mental drool, we won't do it. And you know, Masako, I'm not even that conservative. The left has gone too far, that is all. Until they reel themselves in one should not expect reasonable and responsible people to compromise with them.
Comment: #6
Posted by: Tom
Wed Dec 21, 2011 6:32 AM
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Tom, no argument about the left. It sucks.
The problem is, people who deny (1) the theory of evolution, (2) global warming (fine, argue about the cause and the fix--but not the phenomenon itself--the oceans ARE rising, unless you think the entire science community is conspiring to manufacture data about that), (3) the toll pollution and over population are taking on the planet, and (4) etc., make the left start to be attractive when they propose their idiotic solutions.
There seems to me to be a problem with extremism on both sides. And an awful lot of those in the middle are corrupt and indifferent.
I'm reminded of an old Larsen cartoon about a convention of dinosaurs. The brontosaurus at the podium is saying: "Folks, we've really got a problem. The ice age is coming, the mammals are taking over the planet, and we all have brains about as big as a pea." We aren't facing an ice age--just the opposite. Mammals run the planet right now, but maybe now after Chernobyl and Fukushima, the balance will be tilted toward those who glow in the dark. And we have brains much larger than a pea, but we sure don't act like it a lot of the time.
Happy Holidays to you, and dare I say it? Merry Christmas. Or happy winter solstice. Personally, I go for the Sioux Indians' Wakan Tanka, the great mysterious. May we find a way to continue and magnify our humanity, and be thankful for all God has given us, whoever your and my God happens to be.
Comment: #7
Posted by: Masako
Wed Dec 21, 2011 7:50 PM
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Masako,
We are the only ones left standing. 1) evolution makes sense, just frame the timespan, 2) Two days ago we were not going to see any snow by Christmas, but today there is a 35% chance of snow, if you don't know what is happening three days from now you surely do not know what will happen in three decades, and please don't pretend you do, the failure is a humiliation. 3) at what point in history have as many been fed and warm, the middle ages in Persia? Get over it, these are the good old days. 4) Why should anybody be attractive while proposing idiotic solutions? Idiots are idiots regardless of what face they wear. They are already over-appealling because they pretend to be free thinking and kind, but look at Maher's statement and ask if he is kind or free thinking. He is certainly not either. What the left was in 1970 they are assuredly not any more. They are the class bullies now. Look at how they treat some one as innocous as Tim Tebow. How has he harmed anyone? He has harmed no one. The left have given up any semblance of kindness to blind ideology. Ger over them, the ends never wil justify the means.
Merry Christmas, or Wakan Tanka. I don't know of that, but if Masako says it's okay, it's okay. Until we fight over another article, bless you this joyful season.
Comment: #8
Posted by: Tom
Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:53 PM
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