Stigma is the toughest hurdle that people face in understanding the myths and realities of addiction and what to do about it.

Shame fosters stigma, and stigma promotes shame — oftentimes preventing those who suffer with the illness from seeking help and their loved ones from talking about what's going on. And stigma also results in public misperceptions and public policy that is divorced from the reality that people can and do recover.

Dear Mr. Moyers: I have two children — my daughter is 16, and my son is 14. I am divorced from their father, who works for a program that tries to scare young people about drugs so they won't use them. I am very concerned that my children are severely frightened by anyone that is known to have ever done any drugs at all — even if they are in recovery.

This is a big issue in our house because my new husband's son, who is 24, got in trouble when he was younger due to substance abuse. He's clean now, has a baby and is due to get married soon. But when he comes over to visit his dad, my children go into an absolute tirade and huge panic.

I am looking for ways that my children can learn and see that people who do or have done drugs are not people to be scared of, but rather people who need help and can actually change to become better people who live better lives. I want to teach my children to have an open mind and not be totally black-and-white about human behavior and addiction. — Sincerely, Lisa W. in Minneapolis.

Putting a human face on addiction is the first step in unmasking the stigma.

Dear Lisa: Kudos for your willingness to educate your own children not just about the problem, but the solution, too. The popular image of the alcoholic or drug addict is that of a criminal, a homeless old man living under a bridge or a person of color other than white hanging out on the street corner across the railroad tracks in the bad part of town.

But as you are aware, nobody is immune to the ravages of addiction. I urge you to sit around the table over a meal with your children and your husband's son and have a conversation about this issue. Face-to-face dialogue often cuts right through the fear and anger to the heart of the matter, and I predict everyone will come away from that meeting feeling more love, respect and understanding for each other.

But beyond that, I hope you will arrange for a visit with your kids to a treatment facility in your community. Such programs are easy to find in the phone book or Internet. I'm sure that facility will allow you to meet with the patients or observe a group therapy session. Your kids will realize that addicts and alcoholics look like everyone else.

Addiction is a bad problem affecting good people. [AZ1]

A shining example of this can be found at the Website for Brighton Hospital in Michigan (www.brightonhospital/org/testimonials/video). Here, viewers see real faces and hear real voices of people whose treatment at Brighton has resulted in recovery. These videos also are featured on the YouTube Website.

On a national scale, Faces & Voices of Recovery (www.facesandvoicesofrecorvery.org) is mounting a grass-roots effort to encourage people in recovery and their families to stand up and speak out. This nonprofit based in Washington, D.C., has organized community-focused rallies, marches and even a presidential town hall meeting last week in New Hampshire. (I'm on FAVOR's board.)

Addiction doesn't discriminate. And neither should recovery.

William C. Moyers is the vice president of external affairs for the Hazelden Foundation and the author of "Broken," a best-selling memoir. The paperback edition was released in August 2007. Please send your questions to William Moyers at [email protected]. To find out more about William Moyers and read his past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.