My soon-to-be-16-year-old son, Henry, took the written exam for his driver's permit this week. He didn't pass. I shared his disappointment. And I admired his commitment to study harder for next time.

But secretly I was relieved. If only for a few more weeks, I selfishly know, my son won't be behind the wheel of a car. With cell phones and iPods and those little headphones stuck in the ear, drivers today face road hazards that were nonexistent in earlier generations.

According to an Automobile Association of America survey released this week, more than half of drivers admitted to using a cell phone while driving, and 15 percent said they had text messaged on the road. The most chilling statistic: One in 10 admits to having driven drunk in the past month alone.

We all still have a lot to learn about the dangerous distractions to driving of technology. But none of us should need to know anything else about the effects of alcohol.

Dear Mr. Moyers: Fifteen years ago, my parents were killed by a drunk driver while they were coming home from a church dinner. In my heart, I cannot forgive the young college woman who killed them. It was her second DWI. She spent time in prison and must live with the scars of her actions for the rest of her life.

But to my shock, she recently contacted me. She wants to meet me to work together to educate the public about the dangers of drunk driving and how treatment is what offenders must get. I'm not a harsh or vindictive person. Still, I have a hard time accepting her premise about treatment.

Should I meet with her? I don't want to let drunk drivers off the hook or send a wrong message here.

My parents are dead because she drank too much and got behind the wheel — it's that simple. — Melissa W. in Atlanta

Dear Melissa: Your family's tragedy will never disappear. Neither will the woman's responsibility for causing it. What she did was wrong. But perhaps there is some good that can come from this. On a personal level, only you can decide if meeting with her is the right thing to do.

I'm sure it won't be easy. There is, though, power in publicly sharing your story in the context of how she shares hers. Together, both of you can help people understand the tragic toll of drunk driving while at the same time raising awareness about how to prevent it.

Not everyone who drives drunk needs treatment. But as part of a sentence, alcohol treatment can help defendants learn to take responsibility by gaining and maintaining sobriety. A repeat drunk driver who simply goes to prison is likely to do it again someday, no matter the consequences. But they're unlikely to ever drive drunk again if treatment leads to a lifetime of sobriety. Remember, from adversity comes opportunity. I hope you'll meet with her.

As a footnote, one of the wrong answers my son gave on his driver's test was about the legal limit for driving under the influence. "I don't think I should have to know that, Dad," Henry said. And why, I asked? "Because you and Mom are in recovery, and you've told me that any kind of drinking is dangerous, so I don't plan to do it."

If only it were that easy. If only the outcome were so certain.

William C. Moyers is the vice president of external affairs for the Hazelden Foundation and the author of "Broken," a best-selling memoir. The paperback edition was released in August 2007. Please send your questions to William Moyers at William@williammoyers.com. To find out more about William Moyers and read his past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.

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