Hey guys, how's this for an excuse: Older men chasing younger women contributes to human longevity and survival of the species.

Researchers at Stanford University and UC Santa Barbara say new studies suggest fatherhood by a small number of older men appears to postpone a date with death because natural selection fights life-shortening mutations until the species is finished reproducing.

"Rod Stewart and David Letterman having babies in their 50s and 60s provides no benefit for their personal survival, but the pattern (of reproducing at a later age) has an effect on the population as a whole," said Stanford demographer Cedric Puleston.

"It's advantageous to the species if these people stick around. By increasing the survival of men you have a spillover effect on women because men pass their genes to children of both sexes."

But before older men get, well, too gung-ho, consider this news from the National Institutes of Mental Health. A brain imaging study published online in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences indicates that compared with younger participants, older participants showed less activity in brain motivation hubs when they played a video game and won money.

In other words, the scientists said, the brain's reward centers appear to change with time, making pleasure feel a little less pleasurable as we age.

BODY OF KNOWLEDGE

A man's hair grows faster when he believes he's about to have sex; this is less so for women, according to Stephen Juan, author of "The Odd Body."

NEVER SAY DIET

The world's speed-eating record for shoo-fly pie, a kind of gooey molasses-coffee cake concoction, is 11.1 pounds in 8 minutes, held by Patrick Bertoletti.

MEDTRONICA

Podiatry update

podiatric.blogspot.com

A podiatric surgeon talks about what's new and news about feet. Some of the discussion seems quite technical: "All functional hallux limitus really is, is a temporary increase in the dorsiflexion stiffness of the first MPJ!" But other tidbits, such as new research about shoes and running styles, is both interesting and useful.

DOC TALK

Retrospectoscope — the instrument of hindsight

PHOBIA OF THE WEEK

Lachanophobia — fear of vegetables

BEST MEDICINE

When a doctor himself needs doctoring so another doctor doctors the doctor, does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor the doctor the way the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring of the doctor being doctored doctor as he wants to doctor?

OBSERVATION

Hypochondriacs squander large sums of time in search of nostrums by which they vainly hope they may get more time to squander.

— English writer Mortimer Collins (1827-1876)

CURTAIN CALLS

In 2003, an outraged 220-pound woman killed her boyfriend in the middle of a Brooklyn street by sitting on top of him and beating him to death with her shoe. Her murderous rage was spawned by what she considered a lame reason for the break up: Her boyfriend said she had foot odor.

To find out more about Scott Lafee and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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