Q. My grandson is 6 years old. He lives with his mother and stepfather. He lived with me from the time he was 18 months until he was 4 years old.

He's exceptionally smart, very curious and loves to learn. He started kindergarten and was advanced to what they called the Kindergarten/First-Grade Split. Yesterday his teacher told my daughter that our grandson won't be sufficiently challenged in his school. Where can she go from here? Her husband and she struggle from paycheck to paycheck to get by, so a private school is out of the question. Any advice?

A. When a teacher suggests that a school is not sufficiently challenging, she undoubtedly has a good reason for recommending that your daughter seek out further resources for her son's education. Many public school districts have specialty schools or programs for gifted children. Also, there may be a charter school for gifted children in your area. Don't rule out private schools because of your daughter's income. Most private schools are willing to provide scholarships to very bright children whose families can't afford tuition.

It's probably best for your daughter to ask the school to conduct a complete evaluation for your grandson since his test scores may be persuasive for his acceptance at a specialty school or for scholarship applications. Very gifted children can also be grade-skipped, and it sounds as if the school is already trying to do that for your grandson, although they believe that even a grade skip will not provide sufficient challenge.

For a free newsletter about keys to parenting your gifted child, send a large self-addressed, stamped envelope to P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI, 53094, or read other parenting articles at www.sylviarimm.com.

Teen Does His Own Things

Q. My son is very bright but he drags his feet when it comes to school-work. He doesn't prepare for tests, yet he does fairly well – A's in most subjects. With challenging subjects like Honors Geometry, he doesn't do as well. He's a computer wiz and can spend hours on the computer playing or making games. He doesn't listen when we talk to him about schoolwork. He doesn't see the need to do anything except what he wants to do. Now that he's in high school, we wish he would change and work harder. He's pretty happy in school. What should we do?

A. While your son could perhaps do a little better if he studied, he does seem to be doing rather well. Not only that, he seems happy. It makes sense to review the consequences of his not studying harder. For example, there may be some colleges he'd like to go to that won't accept him. On the other hand, there are plenty that will and as long as he knows he has good choices for colleges, it's hard to emphasize harder work. There are potentially other issues that may concern you. For example, it's reasonable to expect a teen to do some chores around the house, to be respectful to his parents, to take a summer job to earn some expense money, to stay away from alcohol and drugs, and to have friends who are nice young people. If you don't see these issues as problems, consider yourself fortunate and relax and enjoy your son. Many parents of teens are experiencing much greater problems.

For a free newsletter about growing up too fast for high schoolers, send a large, self-addressed, stamped envelope to P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094, or go to www.sylviarimm.com for more parenting information.

Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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