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All Dressed Up …
Somehow over the past few years, our smelly, grumpy old West Highland Terrier of a dog has found himself a pied-a-terre. (That's French for "second home." I looked it up on the Internet.) Harry still sleeps here at night, but every morning,…Read more.
Battle Grounds
As my father got older, like a lot of men, he became more finicky about certain things. One of them was his morning coffee. A true caffeine fiend, every night before bed, Pop would set the coffee maker, along with two cups, a spoon and sugar bowl, …Read more.
Revenge of the Baby Geniuses
This past week, I read that Disney, the company that owns the "Baby Einstein" video series, was offering refunds to any parents who had purchased the products in the last five years and were dissatisfied. "Baby Einstein" videos, …Read more.
Get R' Done Day
Last Saturday, I was out running errands while my wife stayed at home to catch up on some long-delayed house cleaning. I called her between stops to see how it was going.
"Not good," she said into the phone. "One, the washing machine …Read more.
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I Won't Grow Up!Last Sunday night, my wife and I were lying in bed, watching TV, when the phone rang. That never happens on Sunday night in our house, so I jumped up and ran to answer it. I wasn't the first to pick up. One of my 13-year-old daughters was already on the line with a friend, urgent whispers shooting across the fiber optic line. "Hello?" I interrupted. "Dad!" my daughter called out. "Turn on the VMAs! Kanye West just dissed Taylor Swift!" I dropped the phone and turned to my wife. "Quick! Turn on the VMAs! Kanye West just dissed Taylor!" My wife grabbed for the remote. The problem is, we weren't being sarcastic. Somehow, after years and years of having almost all our time focused on kids, we have lost track of most of our adult interests and pursuits. Our adulthood is still there, but it has shriveled away like a vestigial tail. The kids have slowly taken over our living room TV. I'll put on something I like to watch and leave the room. And when I return, the kid channel has been magically tuned in. I put back on my show, leave, and it happens again. Eventually, I give up and just start watching "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody," instead of whatever adult fare I'd been looking at. At some point, I'll even end up laughing. The radio in our car is tuned so often to a kid's music station that I've just learned to leave it there, bopping along to the sounds of Miley Cyrus rather than the rock 'n' roll I grew up with. The CD in my stereo is by Kidz Bop. My wife, in fact, runs every day with her iPod loaded with "High School Musical" tunes. For years, our lives were co-opted by "Sesame Street," "Rugrats" and "Dora the Explorer." I couldn't tell you anything about current political issues, but I could identify all the different engines on "Thomas the Tank Engine." It was a shock to my system when Steve left "Blue's Clues," and I never fully accepted his fake brother Joe. Our kids have gotten older, but we still have young teenagers in the house. I'm not alone. Recently, I was at a neighborhood party when I walked into a group of people discussing the books they were currently reading. It took me a minute or two to realize all of them were talking about the "Harry Potter" series. The problem is, the kids are growing up faster than I am. The other week, I walked through the living room when "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" was on. Two of the teenage characters, high school students, were having a heated discussion about whether or not to have sex. I stopped short, my heart beginning to go into slight arrhythmia. "Hey," I said, trying to sound upbeat. "Why don't we watch that 'Zack and Cody' show? You know they've moved out of the hotel and now live on a cruise ship!" My daughters turned to me and gave me a look of scorn. "Dad," one said, "That's really kid stuff, don't you think?" "Yeah!" I said. "That's the whole point!" We sat there on the couch together, watching Zack and Cody run around the S.S. Tipton, my daughters frowning while I laughed my juvenile little head off. To find out more about Peter McKay, please visit www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2009 CREATORS.COM
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