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I read this week that two men in their 20s from Philadelphia set a new record for sending text messages: In March alone, they sent more than 217,000 text messages to each other. They'd evidently signed up for one of those unlimited texting plans and thought they'd see how far they could push the envelope. They were trying to set a new world record. The cell phone company also set a new record, socking one of them with a bill for $26,300. The cell phone company has an investigation going, trying to figure out why they got a bill when they'd gotten the unlimited plan. Their parents have a separate investigation going, to figure out how they went so terribly wrong.

It seems that texting, the practice of tapping out small, inane messages on a telephone keypad, has now taken over the entire world. Most kids, and a good portion of adults, spend too much time bent over their cell phones, furiously tapping away. They're usually sending messages like "I M BORED" or "WHERE R U?" to people who aren't there while completely ignoring the people who are right in front of them. In the process, they're losing the ability to communicate with other human beings. Ten thousand years from now, humans might still have eyes, ears and mouths, but they'll be vestigial organs, mere remnants of evolution. We'll only really need thumbs to communicate.

Texting is taking over every human interaction. This past week, a man in Saudi Arabia divorced his wife via text message. To be fair, divorce is a lot easier over there.

You just have to confront your wife, say "I divorce you!" three times in a row and then run like heck.

Across this country, teens are getting in trouble for "sexting" — texting naked pictures of themselves to friends. This trend is limited to teens, as no sane adult would want to send naked pictures of themselves to anybody they ever wanted to see again. (Admit it. Look down for a second, make an honest appraisal, then ask yourself, who would want to look at that?)

I recently began trying to text with my sons, all of whom now have cell phones. I have never been able to successfully text my technology-averse wife. Every time I try, she comes home and complains that her phone made some weird beeping noise, but there was nobody on the line. I then spend the next 10 minutes showing her how text messages work, which she forgets within 10 seconds. Kind of takes the fun out of it.

My boys, though, actually read my text messages, even if they rarely text back. The other week, I sent a number of messages to my 15-year-old son during the day. After dinner, he pulled me aside. He was wondering whether I was sending all those messages myself, or having someone else do it. I assured him, somewhat proudly, that it was me.

"Why?" I asked.

"Nothing," he said. "It's just that you do a lot of shortcut, 'C U L8TR!' kind of stuff."

"Yeah!" I said. "That's what people do when they text, to save time."

He looked at me a long time, heartfelt sadness in his eyes.

"People don't do that, Dad. Not people I would read a text message from."

To find out more about Peter McKay, please visit www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2009 CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.


Comments

2 Comments | Post Comment
As much as I enjoy reading Pete McKay's weekly piece, I was a bit annoyed at one section of this particular one. This segment: "This past week, a man in Saudi Arabia divorced his wife via text message. To be fair, divorce is a lot easier over there. You just have to confront your wife, say "I divorce you!" three times in a row and then run like heck." I have no problem with humor, but I do have a problem with inaccurate information. It is not true that a man in Saudi Arabia has to simply say these words three times and it's over. There is a process and the opportunity for counseling and reconciliation as divorce is hugely frowned upon in the region. It would be nice to see someone use something other than misinformation like this about the middle east and make THAT funny.
Comment: #1
Posted by: Syeds
Tue Apr 28, 2009 10:21 AM
Pete, I can't begin to imagine what it was like for that guy to get a $26K phone bill, especially if he actually had a comprehensive plan with unlimited texting. Talk about shock! I get particularly riled when people are stuck with huge, often erroneous cell bills; I hear about this all the time because I work for the consumer advocacy website http://www.fixmycellbill.com , powered by a company called Validas, where we slash the average cell bill by 22 percent. Consumers like this guy may not have been actively misled by their wireless providers, but his example seems to illustrate that cell plans are clearly not impervious to problematic charging and subsequently many “unlimited” plans remain vulnerable to significant usage. I could go on and on about how shifty these cell companies can be in their attempts to make you overpay. I'll mention that at Validas, we stop them and have currently put over $5,000,000 back in the pockets of consumers. You can check out Validas's fixmycellbill.com in the national news media, seen recently on Good Morning America at http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=6887412&page=1.

Good luck to everyone trying to cut your wireless expenses in this rough economy.

Dylan
Comment: #2
Posted by: Dylan
Thu May 14, 2009 1:40 PM
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