Q: I started a new job after being unemployed for some time. While I was unemployed, I gained weight and can no longer fit in my work clothes. I can't afford to buy new things right now. I need to catch up on my bills. I did buy new jeans and a pair of dress pants, but nothing else. I was able to stuff myself into a nice suit for the interview, but I can't wear it again and again. I know my co-workers notice I am not changing outfits often. Should I comment on gaining weight during my unemployment and not having enough money yet for new clothes? Everyone dresses nicely here. How important is it for me to keep up with them?
A: How you dress for work is important, not because clothing on its own is important, but because it shows others you recognize the importance of fitting in with your colleagues. If jeans are the standard, wear jeans. If co-workers dress up each day, you should, too. If you can't stay clean and fresh by wearing only the clothes that fit you, you may have to buy a few things before you lose that extra weight. If you are not a savvy bargain shopper, get guidance from friends.
No matter how little money you have, don't wear things that are now obscenely tight or revealing. Companies can't ban certain body types from wearing certain styles, so you must be able to judge how you look each day. Following the company's written dress code isn't enough.
Choosing the right clothing shows you "get it." You are capable of observing others and following what is acceptable. It sounds easy, but it seems like every office has its one employee who dresses inappropriately for work. One reader's co-worker wore a black dress with a see-through fishnet back to the office. Another wore the front buttons of her dress opened to a few inches above her waist, while another wore a short dress that bared all when she bent over to file.
A person's inability to judge whether clothing is work-appropriate signals others that this person might display additional unprofessional behavior, as well.
Don't announce to your new co-workers that you can't afford to buy clothes. Your financial affairs should remain private. If someone gives you that judgmental stare, say your wardrobe choices are limited because you've gained weight and buying larger sizes will lower your motivation to diet. Opening up about a common problem such as weight might open the door for camaraderie, which may quickly advance you beyond being the stranger at work.
LAYOFFS BY SENIORITY ANGER AN EMPLOYEE
Q: My former company just had a series of layoffs; after the first two, I saw that people were let go according to hire dates. I was in the third and last group laid off. Those left were the most senior, but definitely not the best workers. Management didn't even consider our performance reviews for the layoff, only our hire dates. Why even have reviews if they are meaningless?
A: Using the seniority system showed the old values of showing loyalty to those who had been loyal to the company. Now of course, corporate decisions are generally based on legality and practicality. If employee performance was considered during a mass layoff, the company might receive many challenges to those decisions. Then it would have to justify why a person with repeated fair to average performance reviews remained employed at all while superior employees were let go. You perhaps had greater insight than management into certain employees' performance levels, a clearly awkward and frustrating situation to experience.
Email Lindsey Novak at LindseyNovak@yahoo.com with all your workplace questions. She answers all emails. To find out more about Lindsey Novak and to read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
COPYRIGHT 2012 CREATORS.COM
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9 Comments | Post Comment
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LW1: Church rummage sales, particularly in upscale areas, can be a good source of decent work wear in a variety of sizes. Also watch for sales by other organizations -- the hockey parents at a private high school here put on a fabulous rummage sale every years as a fundraiser. Also: some communities offer specialty thrift stores aimed just at women in your situation. Check for those; also look to Goodwill/Salvation Army thrift stores, and check back often.
Comment: #1
Posted by: hedgehog
Thu Feb 2, 2012 4:18 AM
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Re: hedgehog
Good advice, but we should also include men in this situation, too. LW1 could be male or female, I think.
Comment: #2
Posted by: Beguiling Miss Pasko
Thu Feb 2, 2012 1:28 PM
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LW1: Never "stuff" yourself into work clothes. You need clothes that fit. Wearing clothes you're busting out of is unflattering and will definitely make you look bad to your new coworkers. Do what you need to do to wear clothes that fit where you are now. You don't need a whole wardrobe if you are losing weight, just get a few pieces that will suit you for now. You can wear black pants every day with a white shirt if you need to. Add a simple sweater and you're dressed. If you aren't losing the extra weight though, give it up and get the clothes. Maybe you can trade them to a thrift store for smaller sizes down the road.
Comment: #3
Posted by: LouisaFinnell
Thu Feb 2, 2012 1:57 PM
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Good catch, Miss Pasko. I've read that this tends to be a problem more for women than for men -- which may be why most of the specialty charities are organizing work clothes drives for women returning to the workforce. I think that may be becauwe 1) men tend to lose weight more easily than women (and they don't tend to gain it with pregnancies); 2) men who are large are often perceived as powerful while women who are large are perceived as simply unattractive 3) women's clothes tend to fall out of fashion more frequently/noticeably than men's and 4) women who stuff themselves into too-small clothes tend to get labeled as looking for sexual attention, whereas with men it's more seen as general cluelessness about how things should fit.
But you are correct. It was a poor assumption on my part, not supported by the letter. And I think it IS more likely that a male would ask this question than a female.
Comment: #4
Posted by: hedgehog
Thu Feb 2, 2012 7:35 PM
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LW1: Accessorize.
I am going to assume that LW 1 is female, because male business dress is fairly standard.
Look, this is what you need for business: one pair of black pants, one little black dress (business edition), three to five solid colored tee shirts and a hand full of accessories with a cardigan optionally. Mix and match for a new look every day. No one looks at your bottoms all that often (unless they are in disrepair), they look at the top. This is where the tee shirts and accessories come into play. The tee shirts are a) inexpensive (I never pay more than five dollars for a shirt) and the accessories take the tee shirt from being boring to being business like.
Some days, you can wear your little black dress. Other days, you throw a tee shirt and a belt over your little black dress, it becomes a whole different outfit. I literally have the same little black dress that I've worn to a wedding, a funeral, an interview, a business party and a family party. What makes that dress different for every occasion is a different tee shirt over the top (or just wearing the dress as is) and a belt around the middle. Or with a cardigan.
You don't have to go run out and buy this at the same time. Keep an eye on sales, etc. But, most of what I listed above can be obtained, all together, for under 40 dollars.
Comment: #5
Posted by: Shannon
Fri Feb 3, 2012 10:22 AM
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PS: Check out missussmartypants.com's blog. I am not affiliated with her website, but, her blog often has good ideas for putting a different spin on one or two outfits.
Comment: #6
Posted by: Shannon
Fri Feb 3, 2012 10:24 AM
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LW1 should check out Goodwill, etc.
My local Goodwill is cheap enough but has 50% off the entire store on the first Saturday. Another thrift shop in town has a 50% off (insert item) each week. Every week its a different item. He/She will have to be willing to look at a lot of stuff they don't want/need to find the good stuff but its there.
Comment: #7
Posted by: capiscan
Sat Feb 4, 2012 5:01 PM
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LW1--"Should I comment on gaining weight during my unemployment and not having enough money yet for new clothes?" Absolutely not! The office is not a fashion show. You're at work to work, not strut the runway. As long as your clothes are clean and you look professional, that's all that matters. Unless you work at a fashion magazine, then don't give your limited wardrobe another thought. The important thing is that you're employed now, which should bolster your confidence enough to return to your normal life routine which should include regular exercise and a healthy diet. It won't be long until your old office attire fits you like hand in glove. If anyone should take notice of your attire and comment in a derogatory way, simply smile and say "not all of us are Fashionistas" then change the subject. Good luck!
LW2--I agree with Lindsey in that this company rewarded its most loyal employees by keeping them while laying off more recent hires. This is really an antiquated approach. The company probably retained fewer more expensive employees by doing this when they could have gotten rid of some expensive dead weight while retaining some of the brightest (albeit cheaper) newer hires, and more of them. My guess is that this was a privately held company; most large public companies value performance over years of experience any day. Try to keep this in mind when seeking a new position.
Comment: #8
Posted by: Chris
Sat Feb 4, 2012 5:02 PM
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I have a doctor that has an assistant that always shows 4-5 inches of cleavage. I enjoy going to the doctor. I will that employers would have a dress code that says:wear with confidence the clothes that make you attractive and happy. I think that our country is more toward prudish, than necessary. The employees and customers would be happier.
Posted by Ron
Comment: #9
Posted by: Ron
Mon Feb 6, 2012 6:05 AM
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