Dear Annie: My sister-in-law, "Daisy," has discovered the world of blogging. While I enjoy seeing photos and reading news about my brother, his wife and their children, Daisy has recently been posting unkind remarks about my parents.

My parents have been very generous and supportive of this young woman for over 10 years, and it hurts me to read these comments. When Daisy complains to me about my folks, I try to encourage her to overlook their faults. I understood her frustration with my mother's suggestion of an old home remedy from the 1940s. But I don't understand publicly slamming them with some pretty cruel comments.

When I was first married, I learned to thank my mother-in-law for her advice and then do as I thought best. I have suggested this to Daisy, but she seems hostile to the idea. Should I confront her and tell her that I've read her statements? Should I ask her to stop? Thankfully, my parents do not have a computer so they will never know about this. Is there anything I can do? — Blogging Blues

Dear Blogging: Try talking to your brother. Tell him you enjoy the news and pictures of the family, but you think the nasty comments about the folks are unnecessary. Other family members are apparently reading this blog, which reflects poorly on Daisy, and she ought to reconsider broadcasting her negative opinions. Other than that, all you can do is remove yourself from her mailing list, or enjoy the photographs and stop reading the commentary.

Dear Annie: Two years ago, I divorced my husband, "Jim," after eight years of marriage. We had no children. I have since remarried, and so has he.

The problem is, Jim is a constant presence at family gatherings and holidays. At first, I said nothing, hoping he'd eventually be less attached, but it hasn't happened and now his new wife hangs around my family, too. Some of my relatives think I'm the one with the problem because I don't want to be around my ex at every family function. But my husband and I feel uncomfortable around them, and including them under those circumstances seems disrespectful to us. I do not wish to attend any more functions where Jim is present.

I didn't expect my family to dump Jim like a hot potato, but this is getting really old, really fast. Any suggestions? — Sick of the Ex

Dear Sick: Your relatives get to invite whomever they choose, and you get to decide if you're going to attend. If they keep inviting Jim, they will no longer see you at these functions. Please make that clear to them, nicely, so they can make more intelligent decisions about their guest list for future family events.

Dear Annie: I take issue with your response to "Loving Relative of a Sweet Old Lady," who said her 72-year-old Aunt "Gladys" takes only three showers a week and has begun to smell. You suggested our sense of smell weakens as we age and that her aunt should be informed of this.

In this day and time, the 70s are not old. As you may have guessed, my husband and I are in our 70s and just returned from Holland where we went biking every day. As you suggested, Aunt Gladys needs a checkup by her doctor to see if something is physically wrong. It is not old age. — Still Good

Dear Good: We didn't say her aunt was suffering from "old age." We said that as we age, our senses can dull. This means a 40-year-old doesn't have the hearing of a 20-year-old and a 72-year-old may not have the acute sense of smell that she did at 30. If we don't acknowledge that these things can happen, we don't take the steps to ameliorate them.

Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611. To find out more about Annie's Mailbox, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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