creators.com opinion web
Conservative Opinion General Opinion
Marc Dion
Marc Dion
22 Dec 2014
Tender Negotiations

"Hey, Tommy," you say to one such friend. "You hungry?" "Yeah," Tommy says. "Let's get a pizza," you say. "Yeah,"… Read More.

15 Dec 2014
Heroes Can Do Anything They Want, Right?

Right now, here in America, I think that if you shoved a firefighter while he was fighting a fire, and then … Read More.

8 Dec 2014
Jesus in the Tree

Due, not to popular indignation but to small group litigation, there is no nativity scene in front of the … Read More.

Michele Bachmann? She's a Twit

Comment

Ya figure Dwight Eisenhower planned an invasion. Gotta be half smart, no?

Abraham Lincoln? Helluva speaker.

FDR? Made everybody believe things were gonna get better.

Even the first George Bush knew how to fly a plane.

Oh, sure, Ronald Reagan was doltish, but he could talk. He talked slow, but if you thought slow, he took you right along with him.

Bush the sequel? Affable. Damned affable.

See the progression?

Maybe those of us who drive forklifts for a living aren't getting any smarter but, geez, the in-charge people get dumber every generation.

Other than saying every single thing I ever expected the first black president to say, Obama's a dud, incapable of inspiring anything beyond easily won second-hand triumph among people who thought voting for a black president was a courageous act. I think Harvard must be easier than it used to be, or maybe the curriculum is just so fragmented these days you don't have to be really good at anything except attitude.

Sarah Palin, of course, is an obvious fool, the sort of person who should be running the early shift at a particularly unpopular pancake house. She's a celebrity, not a leader.

Listening to Republican candidate Michele Bachmann convinces me that the level of intelligence up there at the top is thinning out like the air in Denver.

History of your own country, Michele? Duh, it's America, right? Economics? Uh, put the rich folks in charge, like they're not already.

We need jobs.

The people who live on my block need rent money, and yes, people on my block rent, most of them. Average rent? Probably $600 a month, and we can't make that, a lot of us.

The tea party? An entire movement for dummies, and Bachmann owes them her shoes.

Beautiful.

Jobs.

Not part-time, no-benefits, non-union jobs that send the boss's annoying too-skinny kid to arrogance camp and our kids to the crack house.

Jobs.

Real jobs. Thirty-year jobs. Pride jobs. We'll go every day, though at this point the work ethic has probably lost an entire generation due to the fact that the connection between work and reward is now frayed like an old extension cord.

Jobs. Work. Work for the high school graduates, and yeah, I know the military is still hiring. In fact, due to the lack of jobs in working-class communities, the military can afford to be picky.

We've been doing this right versus left thing for a long time now, and the jobs keep going away, and there's no raise again this year.

The Republicans want you to have a minimum-wage job and a gun. The Democrats want you to have a welfare check and a compassionate understanding of what it means to be a transvestite, and nobody seems to care how much you make a week.

But, hey, who cares about your paycheck? Eat your ideology. Be right-wing, poor and proud. Be left-wing, poor and compassionate. First, be poor. That's the new motto.

And that's what we get to eat — slogans. We get hatred to eat and celebrity gossip to drink and listening to Michele Bachmann for a job and the Indian casino as hope for the future.

You want to see countries run on ideology? Take a look at those dimly-lit little corners of the crude oil world, where the Quran is the source of all wisdom and life sucks for everyone except a dozen princes who get to hang apricot-sized diamonds on their illiterate 14-year-old wives.

It isn't that far-right ideology doesn't work, and it isn't that far-left ideology doesn't work. It isn't that communism doesn't work, and it isn't that capitalism doesn't work. It's that extremism doesn't work. Extremism is best peddled by the not-too-bright to the not-too-hopeful

Which means there's plenty of work for Michele Bachmann.

To find out more about Marc Munroe Dion and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2011 BY CREATORS.COM



Comments

5 Comments | Post Comment
The column is right on target but why state the obvious? We need to get out of this economic mess and soon. We need to state and demand the changes that will get people working again. Why did Hong Kong an area surrounded by Red China succeed and become economically free? The reason was that Hong Kong was a protectorate of England which placed very few regulations/restrictions on starting a business or enterprise. Examples of restrictions in the US include the following. A child can't start a lemonade stand in an eastern area without paying a permit fee of several hundred dollars. Minorities can't start up a taxi cab business in NY without paying a fee of $500,000 +. Yet the same business can be started in Washington DC by paying only $250 . That is why there are few black drivers in NY but there are many in DC. To get this country started again we need to get off the man made global warming kick. It doesn't exist. We need to stop subsidies on oil, green energy and most other things. We need to remove many of the restrictions/regulations on industry and business. We need to eliminate our current tax laws and replace them with a flat tax or fair tax. Once we show that we are moving in the right direction the economy will improve by leaps and bounds.
Comment: #1
Posted by: wally mattson
Sun Jun 19, 2011 10:56 AM
Yep, you may think she is stupid, but she passed the bar and is a tax attorney. She must know something! Barry and Michelle didn't pass the bar. What does that tell you? Give it a rest. The white house is full of morons. Any change will be for the better!
Comment: #2
Posted by: Linda Bechler
Sun Jun 19, 2011 2:40 PM
obama learned in harvard that the us has 58 states
Comment: #3
Posted by: dave
Mon Jun 20, 2011 1:51 AM
Oh, Wally ... if only any of the things you said were true. That would be awesome. (You're not alone; I've got an otherwise intelligent friend who somehow manages to believe that the planet isn't getting warmer. Must be nice.)

I've been reading futuristic fiction since the mid-1960s. We're living in -- or heading for rapidly -- one of my least favorite dystopias. The one where a small elite of superrich live on the backs of a huge permanent underclass. The only good part is that we've got the numbers and when things reach a political tipping point we'll be able to start hanging some people by their superrich necks.

There is an alternative -- crazy idea, but listen -- in which the richest few percent of the country could let go of a little more money, and we could work together to make the country a 'way better place to live. Better for everybody -- but then they'd be just slightly less superrich. And the fact is, they like the gap; they like looking down on the masses.
Comment: #4
Posted by: Steven Doyle
Mon Jun 20, 2011 4:47 AM
Marc Dion? He's a dolt. Extremism is best peddled by the not-too-bright to the not-too-hopeful. Which means there's plenty of work for Marc Dion.
Comment: #5
Posted by: David Henricks
Mon Jun 20, 2011 7:14 AM
Already have an account? Log in.
New Account  
Your Name:
Your E-mail:
Your Password:
Confirm Your Password:

Please allow a few minutes for your comment to be posted.

Enter the numbers to the right:  
Creators.com comments policy
More
Marc Dion
Dec. `14
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
30 1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31 1 2 3
About the author About the author
Write the author Write the author
Printer friendly format Printer friendly format
Email to friend Email to friend
View by Month
Marc Dion
Marc DionUpdated 22 Dec 2014
Mark Shields
Mark ShieldsUpdated 20 Dec 2014
Jamie Stiehm
Jamie StiehmUpdated 19 Dec 2014

19 May 2014 Everyday Benghazis

26 May 2014 The Reluctant Veteran

17 Feb 2014 No Gun, Just Allah