Beyond Addiction

The cloud of addiction usually obscures the simple truths essential to reaching clarity that result in decisive action to get help for people in trouble. For family members, the un-channeled emotions of anger and grief often postpone "doing the next right thing" with tough, timely choices. For addicts, it's the narcissistic war stories that convince them they are somehow still on top of it all and immune to the vortex of self-destruction.

So many of the inquiries I receive are replete with more prose than is necessary to get to the point. And I'm sometimes guilty of responding with an equal number of words.

That's why the e-mail I received last week hit home. Short and to the point, with just enough detail to offer insight, I was able to respond with an equally brief set of simple questions, meant to get to the truth by eliciting yes or no answers.

Dear Mr. Moyers: My guy drinks Seagram's VO (whiskey) every night. He goes through at least a large bottle a week. I have only known him not to drink two nights out of nine months; both times his stomach was upset. He does not drink and drive, as he was stopped years ago for a DWI. Also, usually he drinks only after 5 p.m. He says he does not have a problem, and his doctor is aware of his drinking. Is this OK, or is this addiction that's been going on for years? I really care for this guy, who otherwise is a very good man. — Jill J., Racine, Wis.

Dear Jill: Without talking to him directly, it is tough for me to know whether your guy has a problem or not.

But here are a couple of questions that might help you get a clearer picture:

—Does he have specific physical, mental or emotional problems caused by his drinking?

—Has he had any legal or financial consequences as a result of drinking too much since his previous arrest for driving while intoxicated?

—Has he ever tried to quit?

—If so, has he experienced withdrawal?

—Has his drinking affected his relationship with you or others?

—Does he have a family history of alcoholism?

I am not a licensed counselor or medical professional, whose training often includes being able to assess or identify addiction accurately; these questions are forged from my own experiences as an addicted man in long-term recovery, as well as from my role as an advocate for those in crisis. Most people easily and honestly can answer "no" to the first five questions because even if they drink, they do so responsibly and without consequences.

Not the last question, though. It is intended to add context by identifying people who are susceptible to addiction because of the genetic predisposition that is a common trait for people with alcoholism or drug dependence. And while "yes" doesn't automatically label somebody as an alcoholic, a "no" answer identifies denial, for no family is immune to addiction. This is often the biggest stumbling block to the truth.

William C. Moyers is the vice president of external affairs for the Hazelden Foundation and the author of "Broken," his best-selling memoirs. Please send your questions to William Moyers at William@WilliamMoyers.com. To find out more about William Moyers and read his past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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