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Medical Resident Has Little Time for Family
Q: My husband is a medical resident and works more than 10 hours a day and often on weekends. We have a 3-year-old and a 1-year-old, and I often feel like a single parent. My children (especially the 3-year-old) are old enough to notice. Do you have …Read more.
Sister Competition Is Normal
Q: I'm trying to take your advice about encouraging my daughters so we can be a "whole, smart family," but it's not working. My 6-year-old daughter's very good at art, for example, and my 5-year-old's fixated on trying to be as good. No …Read more.
Teen May Have Poor Social Skills
Q: My youngest daughter is 15 years old and in the ninth grade at a challenging academic magnet school. She's doing well enough in school, but I'm concerned about her social skills. To put it bluntly, she can be a bore. She seems happy and has some …Read more.
Daughter Fearful When Tested
Q: Could you tell me what affects what a child considers to be a bad grade and how she reacts to it? I also wonder why my daughter sometimes says she "blanks" on tests, even if she's studied. Do you think she has test anxiety, and is that …Read more.
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Encouraging Kids to ReadQ: My son is in fourth grade. He loves math and science, but doesn't want to read. The class has to pick books from every genre but he will spend 90 percent of his time debating why he doesn't need to read this or that book. How can I motivate him to read? A: Your son's love of math and science will be helpful for choosing a career, but his lack of interest in reading can serve as a tremendous disadvantage since scientists and mathematicians do much reading and writing as part of their work. Furthermore, reading is part of becoming a fully educated young man. Sometimes boys don't read because their reading abilities don't match their higher interests. Thus, it's possible that your son's reading skills are below his other abilities and he feels ashamed to admit his feelings of inadequacy to you. The arguing serves as protection so he doesn't have to let you know he's feeling dumb when he reads. You could request an evaluation by the reading specialist or school psychologist. It wouldn't be enough for him to read at his grade level to feel good about himself. He should be expected to read to his tested abilities. Here are some other suggestions for motivating your son to read: — Children shouldn't be forced to read aloud to their parents at home because the parents' anxieties about their children's reading may be conveyed to the children. Most parents feel tense when poor readers read aloud to them. Children may, of course, read aloud if they choose to do so. However, as adult readers, they'll rarely find oral reading important. — Parents should read aloud to their children as long as the children enjoy it (eighth grade isn't too old). Share your favorite books from your childhood with your children. — Children should be permitted to stay up half an hour later at night if they're in their beds reading to themselves.
— Encourage children to read whatever they like during that pre-bedtime half-hour. Don't insist they read grade-level material. Comics, cartoons, sports magazines, easy material and books that have been read multiple times are all good for reading enjoyment. If they love reading, they'll expand their interests as their reading improves. — Encourage your son to write to a favorite author. Many children's authors return letters that encourage children to keep reading. — Encourage children to read along while listening to recordings of the stories. Don't hover over them to be sure they're actually reading; they will eventually. — Model reading by keeping a book around that your children see you enjoying. Newspapers, magazines and e-books also serve well. — Encourage children to read to their younger siblings, provided those siblings aren't better readers than they are. They shouldn't do this in their parents' presence, but alone with their sisters or brothers. — Visit and browse through bookstores and libraries in your travels or on shopping trips. For a free newsletter about reading disabilities or anxieties, send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the address below. Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2011 CREATORS.COM
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